In the Heart of my Home

Gathering my Thoughts

 

Some babies are allowed to sit on my dining room table. If I'm not careful, I'll be one of those overindulgent types of grandmothers;-).

 

 

::outside my window

My garden is a neglected mess. Today, we'll see what we can salvage.

 

::listening to 

silence. My new rhythm puts writing time at 5AM. Pretty much guaranteed quiet.

 

 

::clothing myself in 

a tank top, running capris, a jacket (it's been cool in the mornings) and some shoes that need replacing. The plan is to head out around 6:30. 

 

::talking with my children about these books

Mary Beth's youth group girls are reading Lies All Young Women Believe. So that means I'm reading Lies All Young Women Believe. Because then we can talk.

:: in my own reading:

I've been listening to audiobooks in binges lately, logging lots of  miles on foot, with a book in my ear. While listening to The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, I kept thinking that much of the relationship guidance had relevance in other relationshps beside married ones. So, I went on to read The Relationship Cure. This one is a must-read for everyone over about 16. Such good wisdom. If  people understood the principles here, the world would be a better place. Certainly, if families operated along these principles, they'd thrive. The problem with books like this, of course, is always that one person reads them and it's not always easy to get anyone else interested...

::thinking and thinking

about productivity. After the  The Relationship Cure, I went on a rabbit trail of reading. My Fitbit really has changed my exercise habit in an extraordinary way. So, I've started to consider other habits and how they could be refined. I'm naturally a very disciplined person, so it isn't so much a matter of will as it is a matter of education. The digital age has changed so much about the way we work, the way we relate, the way we rest--everything is touched by digital media. I've been reading extensively about studies done on the effects of media in general and smartphones in particular. Right now, I'm listening to Manage Your Day to Day. I highly recommend it. I'm also re-reading parts of The Shallows.

  

::pondering 

...between digital technology and rising complexity, there's more information and more requests coming at us faster, and more relentlessly than ever. Unlike computers, however, human beings aren't meant to operate continuously, at high speeds, for long periods of time. Rather, we're designed to move rhythmically between spending and renewing our energy. our brains wave between high and low electrical frequencies ,  our hearts beat at varying intervals our lungs expand and contract depending on demand. It's not sufficient to be good at inhaling. Indeed, the the more deeply you exhale, the calmer and more capable you become. --from Manage Your Day to Day.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

The rhythm is being rocked in a big way. I'm deconstructing my day and then very deliberately building it back by 90 minute increments. There's a new book project I'm working on. I still have to move this blog and fire up the new things I have planned for it. I'm very excited about the new twist on The Storybook Year set to launch in my own home momentarily. And, I'm super-committed to having firm boundaries in place for computer and smart phone use. I mentioned on Instagram last week that we've been having issues with magically disappearing data on our shared family plan. As I've carefully tracked everyone's data usage, I've noticed things about mine. Admittedly, my first big crime is merely leaving windows open when not in use. But still, I'm seeing that I do have a tendency to just "pop in for moment" and I'm learning that those moments are really robbing me of peace and productivity. 

Last week, I sharply curtailed data usage by taking a four day sabbatical from screens and surfing and social media. It was excellent and will be repeated without hesitation. 

Here's to exhaling deeply and creating space for the things that matter most. (Feel free to take both the image and the hashtag.)

 

 ::creating by hand

I finally finished those Quick Change Trousers for Lucy (the ones I cut out before she was born)! And Kristin and I have several more projects lined up for this week. Lots of reading and lots of sewing. Stay tuned for a big edition of needle & thREAD on Friday.

::learning lessons in

Data usage and my iPhone. I asked on Facebook and learned so much!  There are some very infomrative links in that thread.

::encouraging learning in.

Karoline politely declined a playdate yesterday, saying "I was at the beach for a week for dance and then I had dance camp and Stephen had Nationals all last week. I haven't been home at all. I just want to stay home and read."

Yes!

Good girl. I shall carve out lots of time to just hang out and read.

 

::begging prayers

for Sarah Harkins. Twenty-one weeks pregnant, Sarah went into anaphylactic shock yesterday. She is in a coma in very critical condition. Please storm heaven on behalf of Sarah and everyone who loves her.

Please, please pray hard. 

::keeping house

Ugh. My house looks like I've been gone for two weeks but other people have been here. Today and tomorrow--major cleaning happening. 

::crafting in the kitchen 

Before any cooking at all, these tents are being pitched. Oh my stars, the moth population is out of control.

::to be fit and happy

I'm certain that I've logged more than #150milesinJuly. I'll report official numbers later this week.  I'm working that walking program. It's benefiting me in ways unimagined. Truly, the Fitbit was a brilliant investment. Just brilliant.

 




::giving thanks 

for a beautiful week with lots family and lots of treasured friends gathered. Stephen's team lost in the semi-finals of the U. S. Youth Soccer National Championship. It was a heartbreaking loss, but the tournament was exceptionally, incredibly great and this group of boys is truly a gift. It was good. Remember this time last year? All the angst over moving the boys and making big changes? It's all good. In the picture above, Stephen's best friend from his old team is there (with his little brother, Nick's friend) to watch Stephen play great soccer with some very good new friends. In the tent picture at the top? Siblings of soccer teammates from several teams, both old and new, all gathered happily. And, remember that magical team of Patrick's? There were guys there from that team, too, on Saturday. And Nick's former coach was there. And the manager from Paddy's youth team, who also happened to be the mom who swooped in and took care of my children on the scariest day ever. Such community.  

I couldn't have scripted it better. So grateful. 

::loving the moments

when Mike and I are both home and both relaxed. Rare moments lately, but they happened this weekend and I'm grateful. 

living the liturgy

We celebrated St. Anne on Saturday. Sarah Anne called the shots, even though we share the name day. There was sushi and chocolate ice cream. Good girl.

::planning for the week ahead

I talked with Ginny late last night and told her I'm all hers this week. There's been a terrible local tragedy. I have no plans except to be there in whatever way I can. Please, please pray.

 

Gathering my Thoughts Seaside

 

::outside my window

We overlook the golf course and a swimming pool and a pretty stand of palmetto trees. Scarcely a moment passes when I am not intensely grateful. I am so sensitive to my environment (my husband says I'm "high maintenance" in this regard). This setting is balm for my senses. 

 

::listening to 

my children playing card games. They have been enjoying one another tremendously this trip. Another thing for which I am unspeakably grateful.

 

::clothing myself in 

Mornings find me in a tank top and yoga shorts, logging 4-6 miles in the neighborhood before leaving for dance obligations. At the convention center, it's jeans, a t-shirt, and a sweatshirt. Early mornings are hot, sweaty messes dirpping with nearly tropical beauty. Daytime is an overactive air conditioner in a dark, loud room punctuated with loud music and flashing lights. 

 

::talking with my children about these books

The Seashore Book

How to Hide an Octopus 

Hotel Deep: Light Verse from Dark Water

Seashore: One Small Square

The Underwater Alphabet

A Swim through the Sea

What Lives in a Shell?

Out of the Ocean

Hello Ocean

What's it Like to be a Fish?

Seashells by the Seashore

We're having fun with these this week, bringing them to life in real life.

Also, Shakespeare. Karoline is obsessed with Shakespeare. I think she might know Shakespeare better than I do. (This has everything to do with it.)  So, I find myself talking about plot twists with her all the time and I hear her just dropping a little Shakespeare quote into--you know-- normal, everyday seven-year-old conversation.

:: in my own reading:

I listened to Anna Quindlen's Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake all the way down to the beach. What an incredibly great writer! It's such a pleasure to me to read long, thoughtful chapters woven with great words--such a contrast to many of the memoir books I've recently read, which are really just compilations of quick blog posts. This book is meaty. It was also thought-provoking and jarring. At the beginning, I found myself nodding with the recognition of shared experiences. Then, abruptly, we diverged.

In her arrogance and her misinformation, she has intellectually eschewed her faith. The faith chapter doesn't even make sense in her illogical assumptions. I listened to book on Audible, read  by Quindlen herself--an experience which brought depth to the book. I could hear her voice choked with emotion as she talked about her mother's death, now 30 years ago. I felt her pain and I strongly identified with how cancer in one's early twenties can change the perspective she has on life forever. You never take a moment for granted and you barrel through all of life, determined to squeeze every second out of it for the good. I get that. I live that.  

But I also heard Quindlen's the contempt and the superiority in her voice when she spoke about the Church. I wish I could access my Audible bookmarks so I could share a quote or two.  She has clearly been poisoned by secular thought and one wonders how someone so bright and so well-read has managed to avoid reading the actual teachings of the Church to which she professes to still belong. She says she's Catholic, but she also says she doesn't believe in heaven or hell. Huh? I have so much to say about this book. Maybe we can talk about it again on a needle &thREAD day. At the bottom of it all though, I have yet to find a midlife memoir that ends hopefully. I've also yet to read one that is rooted firmly in faith. Coincidence? I think not.

 

::thinking and thinking

:: About marriage. At Anne Bogel's suggestion, I've been listening to The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work. Very interesting. Very, very interesting. 

 .

 

.

 

.

::pondering 

 You're never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream. ~C. S. Lewis

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Every day is a little different here. The dance obligations are inked in. I determined to get up well before the children and make time to walk and spend quiet with God. Everything else that happens during the day is intentional--we don't want to waste a moment--but is dictated by weather and energy levels and budget. It's all worikng rather well. The only glitch has been (and I so can't believe I'm writing this) IT issues. IT issues just follow me around wherever I go. It's absurd now. In ana attempt to save data usage on my phone, I've clearly disabled something critical. And Internet use at the condo is throwing a wrench in some time management and challenging my dependence (and more importantly, Sarah's dependence) on divineoffice.org. Oh, well. I love the internet. I hate the internet. I love the internet.

 ::creating by hand

I brought my sewing machine. And I cut some very pretty headbands for the girls to give as gifts. Then I realized that I didn't pack the pedal. No sewing happening this week...

::learning lessons in

Data usage and my iPhone. I asked on Facebook and learned so much! Very eye-opening. the post isn't too far down on my wall. I can't figure out how to link to it directly. If someone knows, please enlighten me.

 

::encouraging learning in

good manners. We are surrounded by people all the time this week. Time after time, my children have opportunities to practice graciousness. 

::begging prayers

 for Elizabeth DeHority

Please pray for people struggling with doubt and faith and fear and hopelessness.

The Pope asks us to pray for this intention in July:

 That sports may always be occasions of human fraternity and growth.

 

::keeping house

It's always simpler on vacation, isn't it?. 

::crafting in the kitchen 

 Lots of watermelon smoothies (watermelon is $3.99), tacos and leftover tacos, hamburgers on a charcoal grill, South Carolina peaches, and a ham that just keeps on giving...

::to be fit and happy

I'm getting lots of fresh air and sunshine. I'm eating well, and I'm working that walking program. It's taken me a very, very long time, but I've finally learned that self care is not selfish. Period.


::giving thanks 

for safe travels, good friends, and a beautiful place to spend the week.

 

::loving the moments

when I have a good FaceTime connection and actually get to see my husband's face. 

living the liturgy

 Mass was amazing here. Totally packed and the whole thing was sung. And, we saw lots of familiar dance faces in the parking lot.

Thursday, The Little Oratory series continues. Leila and I chatted about scripture study for this one. Come join us! 

::planning for the week ahead

 Just going with the flow...

 

Gathering my Thoughts

::outside my window

We have been blessed with absolutely gorgeous early morning weather lately. I'm so grateful! The last three mornings, I've started out on my walks wearing a sweatjacket. Crazy! These walks have been really good for noticing the little pockets of natural beauty in my neighborhood. I think I was missing a lot when I was always only driving by...

 

::listening to 

Silence. And it sounds wonderful!

 

::clothing myself in 

Yoga capris, a t-shirt, and running shoes. I haven't yet showered since the morning walk and since I'm walking to meet a friend at lunchtime, I might just hold hold off until afternoon. Then again, I'm going to walk Karoline to and from dance this evening. Skip a shower all day? Need to work that detail out.

 

::talking with my children about these books

The Seashore Book

How to Hide an Octopus 

Hotel Deep: Light Verse from Dark Water

Seashore: One Small Square

The Underwater Alphabet

A Swim through the Sea

What Lives in a Shell?

Out of the Ocean

Hello Ocean

What's it Like to be a Fish?

Seashells by the Seashore

You get the idea. We're going to the beach next week. What are your favorites books about the beach? I'll add them to my list.

AND: tell me your very favorite audio book for long trips and your favorite beach reading for mom once we get there. Please.

::thinking and thinking

About blogs and blogging. The move from Typepad is tedious. And that's my gentle word;-). It has taken and will continue to take a giant investment of time and money. So, I'm naturally thinking about whether this is what I want to keep doing.

I love to blog. I love the words and the pictures and the medium for journaling. I'm not a huge fan of the techie aspect. The learning curve is steep and time consuming. I love to encourage people. I intensely dislike people who want to argue and insult online. So, yes, there has been tension in this decision. We've pressed forward, though, and I really am bubbling over with new ideas. So, hoepfully within the week, you read my words in a new space. As long as you are subscribed to the elizabethfoss.com feed, nothing will change. If you subscribed when back in the beginning, bless your heart and thanks for sticking around. And also, make sure your feed isn't the ebeth.typepad feed;-). I'll share all the moving details with you very soon.

 .

.

.

::pondering 

When Our Lord corrected Saint Martha, He said, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and upset about many things..." [Lk 10:41] Note that she would not have been troubled if she had been merely diligent, but she was overly concerned and uneasy; she was hurrying about and all stirred up. Rivers that flow gently through the plains carry along large boats and rich merchandise. Rains that fall gently on open fields make them fruitful in grass and grain, while violent storms devastate fields and pastures. A job done too eagerly and hurriedly is never done well. "He who is in a hurry should go slowly,: says the proverb. We perform actions quickly enough when we do them well. Drones make more noise and work more eagerly than worker bees, but they make only wax and not honey. So also, people who hurry about with tormented anxiety and solicitude never accomplish much, nor do they do anything well. St. Francis de Sales

::carefully cultivating rhythm

My children are at Vacation Bible School in the mornings this week and there is soccer almost every day and dance rehearsals every evening. The house is mostly empty and I'm understanding how people who send their kids to school and work from home are able to accomplish so much. The rhythm definitely offers a great deal of white space. I intend to not waste a moment of it.

 ::creating by hand

Sew! I will sew. Or at  least cut things now to sew later. Fat Quarter Shop has a bundle that I click through to look at almost every day. I love Heather Bailey's new Up Parasol. But will I use all those fat quarters or should I be patient and buy yardage instead? But that bundle is delicious and inspiring. I do use fat quarters for all sorts of things. But yardage could be clothing projects...

And around and around we go. 

needle & thREAD is returning!  I've been kind of waiting until the move is complete because every time I upload a picture here, that's another picture I have to upload individually over there (multiply that by 8 years of posts--yeah, loads of fun). But even if we don't finish the move before the end of this week, let's just get back to talking sewing and reading. I've missed it!

::learning lessons in

authenticity and when it's better just to say nothing instead of sharing my whole heart.

 

::encouraging learning in

An IT class. Yes, folks, during the summer where my own IT issues have me literally tearing my hair out, Christian is taking an IT class online with a professor who communicates horribly. That's the perfect storm for the kid with the print communication issues. Tearing my hair out, indeed. 

::begging prayers

 for Elizabeth DeHority

Please pray for people struggling with doubt and faith and fear and hopelessness.

The Pope asks us to pray for this intention in July:

 That sports may always be occasions of human fraternity and growth.

 

::keeping house

This is the week to make sure all the laundry is caught up and every hamper is absolutely empty before leaving for the beach. Christian will still be home, but the chance of laundry happening while I'm gone is ZERO. 

::crafting in the kitchen 

I'm planning beach meals and I'm super stuck. Last year, we had a three hour drive to the beach. I cooked ahead the week before and froze things and then pretty much pulled from the freezer. It was efficient but it was also odd. No one seemed to eat. This year, we have a 7 hour drive. I keep asking for meal suggestions and the only thing they want is tacos. But I don't think that means they want tacos every night. So, one night down, six to go. What shall I cook and bring to the beach or should I shop there (maybe not right in the beach town but an hour or so before we get there so that things can stay cold)? Beach week veterans, chime in. Quickly, please!  (Editing to clarify after some great tips on Facebook:  I need to be more clear. These are great tips, but I have a kitchen. We'll probably be eating most meals in the condo. I do, however, have limited space in the car to get food there and I'm not enthused about paying beach grocery store prices.)


::giving thanks 

for a lovely Fourth of July trip to Rappahannock Cellars. We enjoyed beautiful weather, a nice little picnic, the music of Marie Miller, and of course, delicious wine. Karoline asked Marie to pose for a picture with her and Marie ended up handing her the mic and playing guitar while Kari sang. I don't think she'll ever stop being utterly starstruck. (I did get that picture for her and there's a little video clip on Instagram.)

::loving the moments

When we can slip out together on a Monday night to a local wine bar and gather with our church people and hear our pastor speak. Kind of like "Theology on Tap," but for soccer moms and dance dads in suburbia. Mike and I enjoyed a very local date night last night. Sure takes the sting out of a Monday. 

living the liturgy

Leila and I will be talking about the Liturgy of the Hours right here, tomorrow. Please come back and listen! 

::planning for the week ahead

I'm working on bloggity things this week. And working that walking program. And working on getting us all packed up and ready to go to the beach. And working on housekeeping details. And then working my way into a vacation with the four girls and Nick for a week at a dance competition (Nick clarifies that he is only along for moral support). I use the word vacation with very few expectations that it will be at all "vacationy" for me. At the same time, I'm just a couple hours away from meeting with a friend and together, planning in such a way that we are intentional about making what matters most happen while we are there. We're headed to Myrtle Beach. Please feel free to chime in with suggestions!

 All photos (except Kari with Marie Miller iPhone shot) are the kindness of Kristin Foss, who has her own new blog these days.

Gathering My Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

The garden is once again overrun with weeds. It's crazy how fast they grow.  If I look carefully amidst the weeds, however, I see blueberries about to turn, tiny green tomatoes, little bitty okra and some roses in need of TLC. Some tending today or tomorrow will go along way towards the harvest. I snapped iPhone pictures this morning to document as we go...

 

::listening to 

Birds chirping. It's early morning and today is going to be hot and humid. I so loved the weather in Colorado--much cooler and dry. Never a bad hair day!

::clothing myself in 

a FitBit. Well, not yet, but it's on its way. While I was in Colorado, I rolled over early one morning to see that Chrystal Hurst, one of my roommates, was already up and out. Since we'd spoken the previous night about looking forward to quiet time on the porch in the morning, I figured she'd beaten me up there and claimed a prime spot. When I arrived outside, however, she was no where to be seen. She was out running (or walking) in the beautiful Colorado morning. Her FitBit had insistently nudged her awake (it's not quite silent; I'd definitely heard it, but close) and off she went. A little later, Kat Lee showed me the app for hers. In a few moments she'd checked in on half a dozen people and encouraged them to meet their fitness goals. I like that kind of accountability. These days, I think I need it. So, FitBit on its way and I will wear it. 

::talking with my children about these books

 

Mary Beth read The Fault in Our Stars. I don't read cancer books, so I can't say that I shared the experience with her. I will tell you that she binge read it and she was profoundly affected. Days later, she was still talking, still processing.

::thinking and thinking

oh wow. My brain is full speed ahead. The weekend away filled my tank to overflowing. Watch to see me share those thoughts here. Or at the new blog at Squarespace, if we can ever get that move to go. I'm going to have to engage in some very technical conversations in the next few days. Whisper a prayer or two? I'm serious. I'm not technically minded and these are no small things. The domain mapping here is so convuluted that moving there is nearly impossible without losing all my links and having to place pictures one by one into every post I've written in the last eight years. The day of reckoning is upon me. So, I'm thinking hard and trying to come up with a plan. 

 

::pondering 

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

~Theodore Roosevelt

 

::carefully cultivating rhythm

I returned from Colorado very full. Also, very sick and with very little voice. Yesterday, jet lag crushed me and this wicked summer cold absolutely had its way. A trip to the grocery store completely wiped me out. This morning, I find that I sound much more like myself. Hopefully, it's time now to get on track and fully establish summer rhythm. Here we go!.

::creating by hand

I have a few little things for Lucy cut. I must sew them now or she'll never wear them. Pictures of those and last week's project at needle & thREAD on Saturday. I promise. 

::learning lessons in

I spent three days in Colorado with Sally Clarkson and eight other inspiring women. I learned so much! I was sick when I arrived. And  my blog was down for most of the time there. So, I didn't really learn or do anything at all about furthering my platform. But that was never my intention anyway. I listened and didn't say much. I wrote copious notes because I was afraid that in my cold-induced haze, I'd forget what I'd seen and heard. I literally filled a composition book. Wrote and wrote and wrote--all by hand in a Sharpie. I brought my computer, but didn't touch it the whole time, though there were many opportunities and most people took advantage of them. I focused on absorbing and I hope and pray with my whole heart that I soaked it all in because there was so very much that was good to absorb. I intend to share often in the next few weeks.

::encouraging learning in

Good habits. Summer is the logical time to really work on those little habits that make a big difference. The little girls' bedroom looks like a stuff bomb detonated. I asked them pick up and organize last week. Then I left town. They've taken all their clothes from the closet shelves and lined up all their dolls there. The clothes? On the floor until they figure out a plan for them. Note to self: if you leave children to undertake a big organiztional project withiout your direct input, you will have an even bigger organizational project to conquer in the very near future. Conquer we will.  And then we will work diligently on tidy bedroom habits.

::begging prayers

Please pray for Elizabeth DeHority who continues with her new chemo regime today, even though she's been given almost no hope of it making any difference at all.

And pray for people struggling with doubt and faith and fear and hopelessness.

 

::keeping house

I think that Auntie Leila (she of housekeeping advice extraordinaire) will be visiting tomorrow. I returned home Sunday evening and was sick yesterday. Guess what we'll be doing today;-)?  Actually, we're not going to be all cleaning crazy. We're going to hang out at a friends' pool and play like it's summer. Because I promised. 

 

::crafting in the kitchen 

We ate amazingly well at Sally Clarkson's house. I'm so inspired to bring summer freshness to my table. Also, Mike got a new grill. Let the fresh, light meals begin! First up: smoky ribs with a side of caprese salad.  


::giving thanks 

for time away to really ponder where we've been and where we're going and how important it is to stay faithful to the ideals over the long haul.

::loving the moments

when it's me who comes through the door after being away and the little ones come running and nearly knock me over with the unbounded glee that I'm home. I'd always had a hunch that was pretty fun. It is. 

living the liturgy

our mission church here in my neghborhood is called Corpus Christi. It's our name day this weekend! 

 

::planning for the week ahead

It's recital week. I know I have all kinds of deadlines and probably a little drama in the very near future. I'm kind of scared to look at the calendar;-). Rehearsals and recitals and oh, that worldwide soccer tournament that's happening now. Have you followed my boy? He's reporting from Brazil and charming us all with his unbounded joy over the Beautiful Game.

 

Gathering my Thoughts

.

.

 

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Mike and the boys really got after it yesterday in the yard. I need to follow up all their hard work with a trip to the herb store. It's time to get some things growing.

::listening to 

birds chirping outside my front door. My friend Courtney noted yesterday that birds know no other way to greet the day except in song. We would do well to take our cues from the birds.

::clothing myself in 

Pajamas and Patrick's letterman blanket. It's itchy but I'm too cozy to move to a more allergy-friendly fleece. Besides, I miss him.

::talking with my children about these books

We are still reading Civil War books. Gripping illness and babies being born have delayed our planned field trips.

::thinking and thinking

About being alone. There are very few women who have nine kids. There are even fewer who have nine kids and the youngest is five and they are also grandmothers. 

 There is a palpable shift, even in online communities, towards encouraging women to seize all the opportunities that await them outside the confines of home and family. That's someone else's life. I'm still finding that even adequately meeting the needs of my people and their varied commitments and relationships is more than I can do well most days.That other stuff? Out there? I can't even begin to go there. At least I can't and still do this even close to well.

Way back in the beginning of this life together, my husband and I heard a calling to cultivate the lives entrusted to us and the space He so graciously granted to the glory of God. More than 25 years later, that calling remains the same--only it's way more complicated and demanding. 

Interestingly, the support for wholehearted mothering and homemaking seems to have diminished just as my family has grown and the challenges multiplied. It's curious to me that the same faith community that so vigorously promotes openness to life expresses a vague condescension towards those women who must dedicate themselves wholeheartedly to the care of those lives in order to faithfully fullfill the vocation to motherhood. Not sure what's up with that, but I am assured that God is faithful, that He called us, and that He walks with us still on this journey.

::pondering prayerfully

“During the day we practice what we have resolved to do in the morning. We also have to bestir ourselves to expressions of love, gratitude and humility toward God, ask Him for as many graces as (we) may need. Let us always remember that God is our Father, and we are His children.” ~St. John Bosco

 

::carefully cultivating rhythm

As we head into soccer tournament and dance competition season, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep the extra-curriculars from overtaking the academic necessities. We lost so many days (and our spring break) to illness. It is imperative to stay disciplined in these final spring days.

::creating by hand

I have been up to my eyeballs in all sorts of dance costume alterations. I love to create in a dressing room with a grateful girl. I really do enjoy getting to know these girls (and a handful of boys) and being a part of the hard work that goes into this art. These are the people who fill my daughters' days; I am privileged to know them well.

I'm eager to make a quilt soon, though.

 ::learning lessons in

What matters most. I loved the Restore workshop. It was by far my favorite thing to have ever done online. Someone recently noted the quiet here on my blog and asked if Restore had burned me out. (Ultimate irony, right? Being burned out by the burnout workshop?) The reality is that Restore was written in February. I wrote 90% of it before opening registration and I blogged here and actually was brimming over with creative ideas. So, no, the workshop didn't burn me out, nor did it take me away from here.

What took me away was living the spirit of this blog. We faced some sad burials. My kids were sick. Even my kids who are bigger than me needed me. I traveled back and forth to Charlottesville. I came home to the same serious infection here. What came with it was mountains of laundry every day for weeks on end (every fiber they touched had to be washed every single time), children who needed continuous care, a total disruption of the regular rhythms of our home.

And then I also got to spend sweet, thoughtful, irreplaceable hours walking and talking with Kristin in the weeks before Lucy arrived.

I wondered often how other people manage such things--people who have many commitments  outside their homes. I wondered often, but I didn't often wonder long; I was too focused on doing the work of being mom and making home to have much time to ponder the philosophy of it or to write about it.

I write in the margins. It's what I do. And some seasons there are no margins at all.

::encouraging learning 

We haven't finished our math for the year. Why is it always math that's the issue? We will do math all summer long...

Yay.

::clicking around

Hah! Not much of that happening. 

::begging prayers

For people who are lonely and feel forgotten.

For people anxious over health tests.

For Elizabeth DeHority and Lisa Tobin.

For new mamas and the babies they love--and for mamas who will meet their babies any moment.

::keeping house

I'm going to be doing some furniture rearranging this week. My sister is sending some treasures my way. My big boys have some apartments to furnish. It could look like a warehouse around here for a few weeks as we sort things out. In the end, I like what's going to happen.

::crafting in the kitchen 

We had strawberries and asparagus yesterday. I dearly love spring. And summer? I'm so ready to cook from the Farmer's Market. Bring it.

.

 

::loving the moments

Karoline and Nicholas had to wait a week after Lucy Shawn was born before they could finally hold her. For both of them, the wait was by far the worst part of being sick. They are both being aggressively treated by an eye specialist and we hope to minimize the longterm damage, but the active infection is finally gone from my house. (Nine, ten weeks later? I've lost count)

They were overcome with sheer joy when the moment finally came for them to hold the sweetest baby on the planet. I'm not entirely sure that Nick has actually seen her still. But the blurry baby sure felt good in his arms. There really are no words and even the pictures can't quite capture the elation.


::giving thanks 

for mostly healthy kids.

living the liturgy

It's still Easter! Every evening, during Night Prayer, Sarah marvels that it's still Easter. This is seriously the longest day ever, Mommy.

::planning for the week ahead

Trips to visit the opthamologist.

Some loving on Lucy.

Nick has a State Cup game midweek deep into the next county. We will sit in traffic for a couple hours before arriving at the game site. Those kinds of games don't usually end well. The home team has a ginormous advantage and this home team is formidable anyway. Your prayers for an exception to the rule would be awesome. This kid has had a ridiculously hard year and I'd dearly love for the tide to turn. He's healthy enough to play and he's eager. I'm kind of holding my breath.

Christian's birthday is Tuesday. He'll take an exam to celebrate.

Christian returns home Wednesday. Patrick will spend the summer in Charlottesville, regaining strength and endurace and, no doubt, preparing to come back to the pitch better than ever!

The weekend holds lots of soccer and dance. Karoline has missed three weeks of dance. When you're seven and not a little ADHD, three weeks is an eternity. She got back in the studio last night and did some good work. She's going to have to be very focused in order to remember all she's forgotten before she dances this weekend. And it would be really great if her peripheral vision were just a wee bit better. 

The week holds lots of organizing and orchestrating in order to arrive at the weekend both efficiently and peacefully. 

My mother is arriving towards the end of the week. She has a new great-grandchild to get to know.

I'm more than a little overwhelmed as I grid in everyone's everything. There will be lots of prayer. And maybe some coffee.

 

Bluebells and Baby Talk

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Yesterday was perfectly beautiful! Sunshine and a breeze, bluebells and fairy spuds, and a body of water begging our uninhibited play. We took about 300 pictures. I asked Mary Beth to upload a few. What you see above is what she chose. And you can't even tell it's bluebell season. We began the day with a long walk around the Bluebell Trail. There were plenty of flowers there, though it's not yet peak bloom. Then, we went and plopped down at our favorite creekside spot--the one that is  fairly short walk from the parking lot so we didn't have to haul all the food and water and photo equipment down the longer trail. And we discovered that a very large swathe of bluebells and trees had been obliterated. Not sure what "progress" is planned there, but it certainly doesn't look as glorious as the tableau God created. Makes me sad. And also determined to add some flower pictures to the end of this post.

::listening to 

rain and birds outdoors and utter silence inside. Yesterday ended in sleepovers--lots of children with "fresh air poisoning" are still sleeping hard this morning.

::clothing myself in 

Capris and a T-shirt  of Mike's. The temperature is due to drop 40 degrees over the course of this day. I'm sure my summer sleepwear will gvie way to jeans and a sweatshirt before the day is finished. 

::talking with my children about these books

Bull Run Regional Park (our bluebells playground) is right next to the Bull Run Battlefield. We've punged into a Civil War reading binge for the next few weeks. In addition to Ken Burns' series and this fun book to get us going, we're reading these great books, from a previous year's Civil War study. I started to cut and paste them here, but this post already has the potential to be ridiculously long.

 

::thinking and thinking

about babies. Kristin is due any day. I love babies. I love pregnancy and childbirth and, with one exception, I really love postpartum, too. I have a million things I want to share with her. Things that beg to bubble up and over in a rush of enthusiasm. I'm sure she feels like I've shared a million things. But I haven't. Probably I've shared about a hundred. The rest I ponder in my heart. (Or mention to Mary Beth;-). 

::pondering prayerfully

"We need saints without cassocks, without veils - we need saints with jeans and
tennis shoes. We need saints that go to the movies that listen to music, that hang
out with their friends (...) We need saints that drink Coca-Cola, that eat hot dogs,
that surf the internet and that listen to their iPods. We need saints that love the
Eucharist, that are not afraid or embarrassed to eat a pizza or drink a beer with
their friends. We need saints who love the movies, dance, sports, theatre. We
need saints that are open, sociable, normal, happy companions. We need saints
who are in this world and who know how to enjoy the best in this world without
being callous or mundane. We need saints”."
– Quoted by Pope Francis at World Youth Day 2013 Or maybe not...

::carefully cultivating rhythm

These are our blubebell days. This is Holy Week. We are going to have a new baby in this family within a week. Still, there is rhythm. The days begin with deep draughts of Jesus. You should see the view from my "Bible chair." Oh, wait, I'll show you:

So, it's a little difficult to get up and get going. I'd like to just sit here all day and look at that tree and journey with Jesus to the tomb and on to Glory. But the bluebells are blooming and the greatest feast of the Christian year approaches and, well, sitting isn't really for moms. So, the rhythm of the ordinary--laundry, groceries, even some lessons--is woven into the extraordinary: bluebells, babies, and resurrection. 

This is a pretty amazing time of life.

::creating by hand

over the winter, I created a workshop. I poured heart and soul into it and I felt God's hand guiding mine as I typed. It was a pretty wonderful creative experience. The workshop is nearly over and I can honestly say I've never spent a lovelier, more Spirit-filled time online. 

And now that those words are all said, I'm turning my attention to baby sewing and baby knitting that didn't happen. Maybe, just maybe I'll get some of it finished before our granddaughter appears.

 

 ::learning lessons in

community

::encouraging learning 

in time management.  Mary Beth is taking classes at our local college for dual enrollment credit. I consider these classes to be such a great gem in our high school homeschool experience. I am able to guide them very practically through the acquisition of skills necessary to succeed in college. She's been a joy to work with and her classes this semester have been thoughtfully presented. Still, learning to balance un moveable deadlines is a skill that homeschoolers don't have have. Until they do;-).

::clicking around

So, I've had very little online time at all this year. I spent January and February really focused on writing the workshop. I spent March on the workshop and some very intense weeks traveling back and forth to Charlottesville. And April? April is whipping by in a blur of bluebells and (hopefully soon) baby. The full step back from the online world has yielded some unexpected perspective. 

About 4 years ago, the internet didn't seem like a very friendly place to me. I had grown wary of nearly every click. Comboxes were especially terrifying. I tried to navigate around those uneasy feelings and I kind of limped along on old paths. With this break, I've had a chance to reframe from focus, to come back and explore and discover the online world of motherhood anew. I've also broken in a new computer and it doesn't know any of the old, haunting places. I'm visiting a few, friendly, familiar places and I'm finding some new-to-me ones. I'm even venturing into comboxes and enjoying conversation in mine. Mostly though, I'm limiting myself to just a few minutes a day and I'm very intentional about spending those moments only in places that encourage me and challenge me to better live my vocation. What are some of your favorite places to visit online?

::begging prayers

for Michael and Kristin and Baby Girl.

for cancer patients and for all the people who love them. Cancer is a hideous, horrible disease and watching it devour someone you love is incredibly painful.

for all the intentions of our prayer community. (I promise to be more faithful to our weekly posts, starting this week!)

For college students, especially the ones who are lonely and feel forgotten.

::keeping house

We managed to pull off some of my lofty Lenten cleaning plans. The garage is in great shape, comparatively speaking. We've deep cleaned some cabinets and closets and Ithought I had the laundry monster under control. Last night, though, I noticed that it has reared its ugle head  yet again in the little girls' room. I think they just have way too many clothes. Or something. I'm not sure what.

::crafting in the kitchen 

I think it's a good day to come up with an Easter menu. Got any great ideas?

::loving the moments

When I can sit in the sun with a friend and watch my kids romp in the water. Love those moments so very much!


::giving thanks 

for Joy Messimer, who took my Restore Workshop ideas and made something tangible and beautiful of the words. She's such a blessing.

living the liturgy

These are very liturgically dense days. The altar serving schedule, the youth group schedule, the straddling still between two parishes and the wanting to be at the basilica downtown, but not wanting to be too far should Baby Girl decide that Easter is a great birthday--it doesn't get much richer than this, if only I see the richness and not mistake it for complicated tangles.

::planning for the week ahead

The bluebells.

Easter.

Kristin is due April 17th and they won't let her go more than a week, so... we're going to get to hold a newborn this week!

Before the Big Snow

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Oh, my goodness! There is the scent of snow in the air. Bring it! 

::listening to 

girls play. Boys build with Legos. This dishwasher swishing. The dryer turning. Life.

::clothing myself in 

Boyfriend jeans, a turtleneck, heavy cardigan. Changing things up, friends--turtleneck instead of a long sleeved T-shirt. 

::talking with my children about these books

Those lovely snow books. And a favorite for this week, too 

::thinking and thinking

About burn out and recovery. Still. I'm writing and writing and writing, in the wee hours of the day, early before the children awaken. There will be enough for a book by the time I am finished--four weeks of "Quiet Time" prompts, four tutorials to keep creative hands busy, twelve {long} essays with lots of thoughts and practical ways to move along to the path of restoration and refreshment. And Joy is making all of it utterly beautiful. We are making great progress!

 

::pondering prayerfully

“There are three things you can do when life sends a wave at you. You can run from it, but then it's going to catch up and knock you down. You can also fall back on your ego and try to stand your ground, but then it's still going to clobber you. Or you can use it as an oppotunity to go deep, and transform yourself to match the circumstances. And that's how you get through the wave." -from the Instagram feed of Humans of New York 

Amazing book!

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Snow days have a rhythm all their own. Our winter appears to have taken on the rhythm of a snow day. Fancy that.

Hah! I wrote that two weeks ago. Or was it three? We are due for a doozy. Big, big snow coming soon!

::creating by hand

Lots of baby things to make today. Lots and lots and lots.

Yesterday, I played with a little hand-lettering. I kind of like it.

 ::learning lessons in

Baby things. Not much has changed in five years. There are no old-fashioned rockers in Babies R Us anymore. And absolutely no wooden high chairs. Ergos are available right there in the store. I remember having to order mine online. But not much else has changed. There's a new crop of little ones to click the scanner for the registry, though. Way too much fun!

.

::encouraging learning 

My little Sarah is nearly reading on her own. And there, my friends, ends an era of reading to children who can't read and snuggling with them while they learn to love all the treasure held between the covers of a book. And, along the way, they learned to read, too. Loved. Every. Minute. Of. It. 

Loved it so, so much. 

::clicking around

Nothing to share here. I haven't been clicking. Five minutes of Facebook a day, Monday-Friday, if I get to it. Up to ten minutes of Instagram. A quick scan of mail to see if I need to answer something. And nothing else. Nothing.

That means I have this little inbox problem:

Those are unread messages. Need to work on that problem.

::begging prayers

for Shawn and for Elizabeth DeHority and for all the people who love them. Cancer is a hideous, horrible disease and watching it devour someone you love is incredibly painful.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

For college students, especially the ones who are lonely and feel forgotten.

::keeping house

It's supposed to snow tonight and all day tomorrow. That means I'm going to clean like a crazy person today. I love to be snowed in. I hate to be snowed in a mess. A clean, snug house that smells of eucalyptus and wild orange--that's the way to begin a snowed in adventure.

::crafting in the kitchen 

Snow food: roasted chicken, chicken and vegetable soup, homemade granola, hot chocolate, and some Valentine cupcakes.

::loving the moments

Talking to Mary Beth about Powersheets.


::giving thanks 

For the boy I fell head-over-heels in love with on Valentine's Eve, 1982.

Now, he makes clover bouquets for our ninth baby on the sidelines of soccer fields.

He's a keeper.

living the liturgy

Last Sunday, four children came to visit us. They hung out here at our house while their little brother made his entry to the world. We played. And played. And played. And we made some birthday cupcakes, too. And at 10:00 Sunday morning we all went off to Mass. We sat in the front row. We prayed for Mommy and Daddy and Baby J. 

And then, when we got home, we heard some glorious news. Baby J was born while we were so earnestly praying. Isn't that so fun?

::planning for the week ahead

Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

And then let it stop. My sweet husband is in Miami. Doubtless, he won't get in Thursday night as planned. As it happens, he's made reservations for Saturday night, anyway. So, as long as he gets in Saturday morning, works for me;-)!

 

Midwinter Musings

 

 

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

The temperatures rose to freezing two days ago. Tonight, we are back under an official Wind Chill Warning. I like the change of seasons and I do love snow. The biting cold is something for which we aren’t really prepared, though. I’d love to get out and walk in it, but it seems ridiculous to invest in extreme cold weather gear when one lives in Virginia. I can bundle adequately for my daily round, but true expeditions in zero-degree weather, not so much. I am so grateful I bought those boots.

Stephen, on the other hand, continues to play outdoor soccer as if there’s nothing unusual about scheduling matches on days when the wind chill is 7* at game time

::listening to 

soccer practice. But of course. They were supposed to train tomorrow night. It’s going to be “too cold.” The current temperature here at the field where snow is pushed into huge piles all around? Twenty degrees, with a wind chill of 13. Warm enough, apparently.

::clothing myself in 

Coat, hat, gloves—sitting in the car, trying to type. This is rather ridiculous and I’m calculating how many actual work minutes I lose driving to Starbucks, versus how many I gain because I can take off my gloves...

::talking with my children about these books

Well, there are the snow books;-). Stephen and I are immersed in Huckleberry Finn . Nicholas is reading through the Chronicles of Narnia . Katie is reading The Long Winter  and Karoline is really enjoying The Doll Shop Downstairs. Sarah has challenged me to read every picture book on her shelf to her before summer. Game on!

::thinking and thinking

About burn out and recovery. About running oneself ragged and about self-care. About renewal and surrender. I have enough thoughts and ideas and lessons learned here to roll them all into a very practical and hopefully healing workshop. And it’s happening! I’m praying for time in the margins to write. I’m also eliminating all computer time that isn’t devoted to writing. I’ll have this workshop ready for you during Lent this year. Your prayers for wide margins in the next month are very much appreciated. 

 

::pondering prayerfully

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”
~CS Lewis The Four Loves

 

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Snow days have a rhythm all their own. Our winter appears to have taken on the rhythm of a snow day. Fancy that.

::creating by hand

As I work to create the worskshop, I’ve definitely lost some creating-with-my-hands time. I know, however, that time with needles is critical to my own burnout prevention. It’s Super Bowl week. That means I’m missing Mike. It also means the girls can hunker down at night and watch Lark Rise to Candleford with me and Mama can knit just a little.

 ::learning lessons in

Time management. Cutting my ties to Facebook was an excellent, beautiful thing. Facebook came up recently on Jennifer Fulwiler’s Instagram feed. I chimed in (something I rarely do) and I also read there about Jen’s Facebook-free philosophy.  Yeah, what she said. I’m still posting blog links to Facebook and I’m still checking for dance and soccer updates there, but this season in my life makes any more than that just plain impossible. I only wish it hadn’t taken me so long to recognize that.

::encouraging learning 

Mary Beth is fully immersed in her first college writing course. I’m enjoying it;-). It always interesting to me to see how different teachers approach the teaching of writing. This is my fourth child to take at least two college-level composition courses. I’m getting quite an education.

::clicking around

For some reason, I haven't been able to get my Delicious sidebar feed to update since before Christmas. Here are few links worth clicking:

Five Questions Every Husband Should Ask His Wife (could probably work the other way, too)

The Questions that Will Save Your Relationships

Marriage Matters and Redefining it has Social Costs

Teaching From a State of Rest After what feels like a barrage of blogs trumpeting the "Do More! Be More! Go More!" message, Sarah is encouraging mothers to rest in Him. Good plan. Very good.

The Creative Adult is the Child Who Has Survived

::begging prayers

for Shawn and for Elizabeth DeHority and for all the people who love them. Cancer is a hideous, horrible disease and watching it devour someone you love is incredibly painful.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

For college students, especially the ones who are lonely and feel forgotten.

::keeping house

No time on the computer, more time for laundry. And, also, I need another bookshelf. Really need it.

::crafting in the kitchen 

Thinking about Super Bowl food. What’s on your menu? I’d like to make it healthy. I’d also really, really like to avoid my family’s snide kale jokes. So, healthy but not obviously healthy? Who has a suggestion?

::loving the moments

of quiet in the morning. Yes, ma’am I am getting up at 5:30 in order to have more of those moments. And yes, ma’am, I’m spending them all with tea, a candle, and a Bible. And I am seriously loving it. Hasn’t quite cured the Cranky Mommy Syndrome, but we’re much improved.


::giving thanks 

for wise women who create very useful tools. Lara Casey Powersheets. I highly recommend them.

living the liturgy

Time to think about Candlemas.

::planning for the week ahead

Stephen turns 15 on Saturday. He’s my fourth boy. I love fifteen. Love it. It means thirteen and fourteen are over. Thirteen and fourteen are torture for my boys. Four down, one to go. Praise the Good Lord!

 

Gathering my Thoughts

 

.

.

 

.

.

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

These have been some very cold days. That’s really okay with me. I like an excuse to stay inside and make soup. Today (Sunday as I write), though, is much, much warmer and the sun is shining after a very dark and rainy Saturday. The world does seem a little happier all the way ‘round.

::listening to 

the comings and goings of cars and boys in the parking lot at soccer. Again.

::clothing myself in 

Yoga pants, a long sleeved T-shirt and warm boots. I really do hope to actually get to the gym today.

::talking with my children about these books

Whatever Stephen is reading. Stephen loves to have conversations about books. I kind of love it, too.

::thinking and thinking

About burnout and recovery. About running oneself ragged and about self-care. About renewal and surrender. I have enough thoughts and ideas and lessons learned here to roll them all into a very practical and hopefully healing workshop. And your notes and emails tell me that might be something you’d be interested in pursuing with me in the late winter and early spring. So, I’d like to work on that. As always, “spare” time is not abundant. It’s going to take God’s provision to carve the time and space for such a project. I’d be so grateful if you’d pray for that provision.

 

::pondering prayerfully

“Our culture has filled our heads but emptied our hearts, stuffed our wallets but starved our wonder. It has fed our thirst for facts but not for meaning or mystery. It produces “nice” people, not heroes.” ~Peter Kreeft

::carefully cultivating rhythm

The rhythm of the last few weeks has stretched me to my limits. My house has been full to bursting. Temperaments and personalities have been colliding all over the place. There have been mountains of laundry and mountains of groceries and mountains of dishes. And all that sounds rather like complaining.

I don’t “do” complaining, so let’s just leave it there.

Monday morning will bring with it fresh lesson plans, fresh chore charts, a menu plan, and emphasis on restoring order and cleanliness with certain vigor and alacrity. I’m looking forward to relative quiet.

::creating by hand

I have some flannel pjs to finish this week. After three Boyfriend Scarves, it’s time to get back my Honey Cowl. The scarves were knit in bulky yarn and they were a quick knit, to be sure. After that, I have serious doubts this Honey Cowl will be finished while it’s still cold enough to wear it.

I did sew a very quick scarf last week. Mike and I had a date night for my birthday and managed to whip up another of Anna Maria Horner’s airy layers scarves on impulse in under an hour. It might be my favorite one yet. So perfect with jeans...

::learning lessons in

Photography! Well, not yet. But my dad and Barbara gave me Ashley Ann’s SnapShop workshop as a birthday gift. I’m so excited about this opportunity. This WILL be the year I shoot in manual mode. Promise.

::encouraging learning 

It's  up and at 'em bright and early Monday morning. No more distractions.

::begging prayers

for Shawn and for Elizabeth DeHority and for all the people who love them. Cancer is a hideous, horrible disease and watching it devour someone you love is incredibly painful.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

For college students, beginning a new semester today.

::keeping house

Christmas is all tucked into boxes, save for the nativity set on the piano. We'll leave that until Candlemas. At least.

There are fresh flowers in my house. Birthday flowers came along just in time to take the place of Princess Tea flowers. I really do like flowers scattered here and there. (I never shared Princess Tea photos, did I? This week...)

::crafting in the kitchen 

So, I set about to do a Vegan Whole30. I’ve done this before, actually for way more than 30 days. When I faltered recently, I reset at Whole9life, to begin again. I noticed when I did so that the word “failure” was in the URL for the reset. That irritated me. Somebody coded that; did they have to use the  word “failure.?” Actually, in terms of Whole30, those times when you diverge from the prescribed plan are usually good lessons, not failures.

I Instagrammed the screenshot and the Whole30 folks chimed in and told me (very politely) that a Vegan Whole30 was an impossibility. Since I did it for probably closer to 120 days last spring and summer, I know they’re wrong, but the conversation gave me reason to rethink the nomenclature of it all.

It’s nice to call it “Whole30” because then you get instant support. It seems the whole world is doing Whole30 lately (very much unlike when I first did it in spring of 2012). What is healthiest for me, though, really isn’t Whole30. It’s kinder and gentler in its philosophy. I’m just not the Type A nutrition/exercise type, even though I definitely lean Type A in other places. Upon further consideration, the older I get, the more my children grow, the more I consciously try to let go of Type A…I'm not all that Type A anymore...

So, I decided to come up with my own hashtag--#eattonurture2014 and to invite community. The whole idea is to create an encouraging climate of self-care without divisive nutrition dichotomies. Are you eating in a way that nourishes and nurtures your body? What works for you? Tag a picture on Instagram and tell me about it. I’m interested. I really am. Later this week, I’ll share some pictures here and tell you about all the lessons “failure” taught me and how I’ve fine-tuned accordingly. I’ll also share how nice it is to have even one good friend who will puzzle out all the nutrition questions with you and support you in a journey.

::loving the moments

about 14 years ago, Major League Soccer signed a sixteen-year-old to play for DC United. Such a move was unprecedented at the time. We just didn’t do things like that in America. But they did. And this boy needed a place to finish high school. He was on his own, didn’t even have a driver’s license yet when we met him. He came to us, to learn with us. Michael was eleven at the time.

I had no experience mothering teenaged boys. We taught each other quite a bit. Eventually, he left here for the English Premier League. He traveled far and wide, fell in love, took a wife.

She’s darling and we love her.

Around Halloween, he sent me a video clip of a sonogram. And he called me “Grandma.” That baby is due just a few weeks after Michael and Kristin expect to welcome their baby. One little girl. One little boy. The plan right now is for me to be with Bobby and Sloane when she delivers. Logistics could be tricky but we’re surrendering that…

So, I’m loving these moments while Bobby and Sloane are here. They’ve left Toronto and not yet reported in New Jersey. They arrived here the day after Christmas and I’m grateful to have Sloane perched on a stool at my kitchen counter chatting all sorts of things while Bobby riles up the boys and whips the atmosphere into a frenzy, while they play endless games of FIFA on the Xbox and some of them remind others that they actually did play in the real live World Cup, and while they eat pizza and mozarella sticks at whatever time of day while watching video clips of "the greatest match ever" (noting they were in that match), while they hang little girls (Bobby's three nieces have come to play, too) upside down by their ankles and swing them until they squeal, while they make a contest out of everything imagineable and truly get their feelings hurt when they're not the winner. They are loud and rowdy and they bump up against each other. Sometimes it makes the hair rise on the back of my neck and it grates on my nerves like fingernails on chalkboard. My husband keeps reminding me that boys will be boys. These are some very big boys! Admittedly, the noise and frenzy has been bigger than I am, but it is nice to see them all together again and to see how they are a band of brothers.

(And did I mention how much I love visiting with Sloane, talking babies and mamas and all the things that go with them? I do so love that...)

.

I can’t help but remember how sad I was when he left for Reading and how worried I was that he’d walk out of our lives forever. They come back. I need to remind myself of that now and then.

 


::giving thanks 

for the opportunity to make a fresh start. At shereadstruth.com there was this proposition for the year’s beginning:

This year, instead of resolving to finally get it right,

let’s resolve to walk with Him as He makes it right.

Instead of determining to get better,

Let’s determine to get close to Him through His word.

Instead of making a list of all that we will do on our own,

Let’s notice all that He is doing and let’s join him in it.

 

Yes. Let’s. And let’s be grateful that He makes all things new.

Let’s surrender.

living the liturgy

Time to order beeswax, to think about Candlemas. I going to keep it simple this year and to pour jar candles. And I think I’ll republish my thoughts on candlelight…

::planning for the week ahead

I’m just going to focus on peacefully settling us all into the new schedule.

 On this day last year: Cravings: a Catholic Wrestles with Food, Self-Image, and God

Gathering My Thoughts Amidst the Beautiful Mess

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

There's nothing like an ice storm to make one catch her breath and wonder anew at the awesome artistry of our Creator. Awesome. In every sense of the word.

::listening to 

The Nutcracker station on Pandora. I love that my littlest can identify every piece of music from the ballet. Never gets old to hear her pipe up no more than a few notes in to every song.

::clothing myself in 

These amazing boots. I am a big fan of Dansko shoes and pretty much live in them. I baby my feet, I admit. I don't wear heels. I'd rather not wear shoes at all. Still, even with all the babying over all these years, I have a pretty significant neuroma in my right foot. Even the slightest narrowing hurts bigtime (no more TOMS for me). Dansko are nice and wide and very supportive. And these sweet boots are warm, too. I'm wearing them all the time. I got them at that link on a great sale. And I will wear them for a very long time, no doubt.

 

::talking with my children about these books

Those advent books are wrapped and ready! We've begun the picture book-fest. So nice to hear the old familiar stories. And I've tucked away the first book for our new granddaughter's collection. It's the first thing I've bought for her.  And everyone thought I'd head straight to Hanna Andersson! This is the first book I remember Michael reading to Christian. And Christian had it memorized, so I'm sure it was the first book he ever "read" to Patrick. Karoline read it to Sarah yesterday and there is no doubt Sarah will read it to her baby niece next year. We all still love it so well...

.

::thinking and thinking

about Christmas shopping. I have purchased exactly two gifts so far. Two! My strategy for life in the past couple of years is to carefully consider a week at a time, plan it all out and then do each day as it comes. If I look further ahead, I hyperventilate. It occurs to me that this might not be a good strategy when it comes to acquisitioning for Christmas. Still, I'm short on brain space right now.

::pondering 

Reverend Mother always says when the Lord closes a door, somewhere he opens a window. 

(Maybe that's why it feels so drafty in here. Lots of open windows ;-)

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Advent has a rhythm of its own and even when it's turned on end, there are still the old, familiar traditions, perhaps in new spaces, that bring rhythm to its heartbeat.

The above could also be read: I dumped the contents of Christian's and Patrick's stockings into paper bags while standing with the rear liftgate of my van open in the freezing rain in the parking lot of Klockner stadium on December 6th, but by golly we celebrated St. Nicholas Day!

All good. Different, but good.


 

::creating by hand

I finished my first Boyfriend Scarf out of Quince Puffin. I love it! Now, I need some blocking advice. I have no special soaps or oils or anything here at home and no plans to leave the house today, but I do need to block today because I'm going to give it on Thursday. So, please, please chime in. I need you!

I've already cast on another. 

::learning lessons in

the Oxford comma. No, not really. I love the Oxford comma and  I don't really care much what Oxford says, I'm going to keep right on using it. 

::encouraging learning in

Gingerbread. 

Want to curl up with some beautiful books and dream of gingerbread? Here's an old post with lots of ideas so that you could do just that and even call it school. And here, are some truly wonderful books.

Gingerbread Friends

Gingerbread Baby

 

 

 

 

.

.

.

::begging prayers

Please come join our community of prayer.

For college students, facing the trials of exams and more.

For my friend Megan and her family and for the repose of the soul of her beautiful mother, Cynthia McMullen.

For our dear friend Shawn Kuykendall, who is suffering terribly, and for his family and friends. Please get to know Shawn a little better here. Leave it to Shawn to get The Washington Post into the National Cathedral to consider God.

For another young friend whose life is being rocked by cancer.

For Elizabeth DeHority who kept her Tuesday chemo date last week and is visiting her sister in England.

For the repose of the soul of Eldo Merlin Foss.

 

::keeping house

the house is clean enough. Really. Last year, I heard voices as I cleaned and decorated and tried so hard. This year, I know what is enough. And this is enough. 

 

 .

 

::crafting in the kitchen 

 We blew up the kitchen with confectioner's sugar and ten tons of candy yesterday. It was so much fun. The nice thing about this beautiful mess is that it all cleans up with a little hot water, a rag, and a mop.

I used Candy Cottages and mini cottages this year. I figured they were a wise investment since we never eat the gingerbread houses (we spray them with acrylic so the bugs don't get them). The kids seem pleased. We had a sweet friend join us, so I did get one of these so she could take it home with her (psst-that's a ridiculous price on Amazon. Harris Teeter has them for $10 and you can get them at Costco, too). We did bake some real gingerbread for eating. Nicholas declared that he likes gingerbread but hates molasses. We're all still trying to figure that one out. 


::giving thanks 

for snow days.

::loving the moments

when the day moves along, busy all day, with good things to do. My to-do list is overwhelming if I look at more than one day at a time and it would be easy to get discouraged (and sometimes I do), but truly, there is no life I'd rather be living and no one else I'd rather spend my days with. It's all good, even if it is real work some days. It's sweet work; a beautiful mess.

  

.

.

living the liturgy

Oh! Our Lady of Guadalupe and St. Lucy and the Sunday of Joy! We are nearly caught up on our Jesse Tree (definitely fell behind in the beginning, but we're getting there).  I feel ike this advent is going at the speed of some sort of Acela Polar Express. I'm trying to slow down, trying to walk softly and gently. This week is so full of advent joys it's likely to move in a beribboned blur. 

 

::planning for the week ahead

 There will be those liturgical points of light.

And there will be dress rehearsal and Opening Night and Closing Night, a Princess Tea performance day (2 shows), and a Nutcracker Tea performance day (2 shows). Oh, and then there's this other little thing: the NCAA Final Four, also known as the College Cup. Patrick will play (please pray he plays) the semi-finals in Philadlephia on Friday Night, also know as Nutcracker Opening Night. Kickoff should be right around the same time as the Sugar Plum Fairy dances her solo. Mike and I will hope that my cell phone works backstage (it won't). He's going to Philly. I'm going to the show. Then, if Patrick wins Friday night (please God), we'll both be able to go to the finals on Sunday. 

.

 .

.

Gathering My Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

I still haven't put that layer of topsoil on the front bed. I'm sure the girls didn't dig six inches to plant those tulips. We're going to have a "wintry mix" momentarily. I'm going to be so bummed if those tulips don't come up in the spring.

::listening to 

Christian teasing Sarah Annie incessantly. Music to my ears...for about the first hour. Now it's making me crazy.

::clothing myself in 

Layers. Lots and lots of layers. The wind chill was 7 degrees Sunday when Nick and I were hanging out together for soccer at sunrise. I wore running tights that are as old as he is under my jeans. And boots and two pairs of socks. I even wore a wool sweater for the occasion (and wool makes me itch and wheeze). Baby, it's cold ourtside! 

::talking with my children about these books

We fnished The Mysterious Benedict Society over the weekend. And we began the sequel, The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey. I admit, I'm hooked. On the drive to Ginny's (when we didn't have the boys with us and didn't want to get ahead of them with those books), the girls and I listened to Caddie Woodlawn. I'm sure this is the fourth time listening for me. It never gets old. 

::pondering prayerfully

"Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well.  Then youth will be delightful, old age will bring few regrets, and life become a beautiful success, in spite of poverty." ~Marmee in Little Women.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

I've been well pleased with our  November rhythm, even though it was sorely tested and most definitely rocked. We will hold to the same basic plan through Advent. 


 

::creating by hand

Monday was a happy, creative day. I began early. Mike had a very early flight and I awoke with him. By 5:15, I was stitching my way around some pretty pink tulle. After that project was completed (I'll share it with needle & thREAD on Friday), I started working on some sweet, scrappy hostess gifts.  Then, with a fire roaring and Karoline begging to watch Little Women (again). I actually sat still in the middle of the afternoon and merrily knit away while Jo figured out the Professor Bhaer was a great catch. I like Professor Bhaer better in the movie than I do in the book. I really, really like him in the movie;-).

::learning lessons in

tutus. Plotting with one of the girls' teachers for the ultimate girls' weekend.

::encouraging learning 

Stephen is sprinting to the finish of the November Novel Writing month. We're reading Thanksgiving books just now. Mary Beth is back at work in the Delegate's office, helping to draft legislation before the winter session.

::begging prayers

For my friend Megan and her family and for the repose of the soul of her beautiful mother, Cynthia McMullen.

For our dear friend Shawn Kuykendall, who is suffering terribly, and for his family and friends. Please get to know Shawn a little better here. Leave it to Shawn to get The Washington Post into the National Cathedral to consider God.

For Elizabeth DeHority who kept her Tuesday chemo date today.

For the repose of the soul of Eldo Merlin Foss.

::keeping house

Today's the day: the final scrubdown before the first Sunday of Advent comes with all its decorating splendor. Total clutter elimination and a washing of every wall are the goals. We did the basement walls a couple of weeks ago and now I'm obesessed with wall washing. My poor kids are not fond of my obsessions. 

::crafting in the kitchen 

I'm making cinnamon honey butter today, to combine with the scrappy hostess gifts. It's in the experimental stage right now. I'll let you know how it goes.

::loving the moments

Mike has been gone for most of the last week. He was home for a few hours Sunday night and early Monday morning. I'm grateful for those few moments we had and I'm very much looking forward four days off. We need every minute of those four days.


::giving thanks 

for my husband, who is steadfast and strong. He's carrying a heavy load right now and doing it with determined holiness. He thinks it goes unnoticed. But I notice. And I'm so grateful. 

::living the liturgy

I've been prayerfully considering living liturgy almost every waking hour for the last few weeks. My own personal connection to living liturgy is the Liturgy of the Hours, more than anything else. It's real and accessible and such a gift of the Church. It's always there and I bring away something new every time I pray with the universal Church. I've brought my children into my private time with the Hours more and more this season, maybe because I recognize that this practice is enduring, no matter what, no matter where. 

I love the feasting and fasting of the Domestic Church, though. I have poured heart and soul into creating and preserving traditions with my children. The struggle between the secular calendar and the liturgical one becomes more pronounced as the children get older, not because the children are becoming more "secular," but because they have obligations to outside elements. Their worlds grow wider and so, ours do, too.

Soccer tournaments. College exams. We try to create a climate of peace and holiness within our homes, but then... there is also the call to go to them. To be at the big game, and so to forego decorating the tree on the First Sunday of Advent. To hold off on St. Nicholas Day treats and to send exam week care packages instead. To let the little ones have the same hands-on liturgical experiences as the big ones did, while still considering the fact that they might not carry them into their own homes when they are grown after all. And somehow, to do it all without feeling like the purposeful intentions in the heart of the young mother are not slipping through her fingers in middle age...

::planning for the week ahead

Tomorrow, Michael and Kristin have invited me to take a glimpse at the greatest blessing imagineable. And hopefully I'll know whether to trim that tiny white cardigan in pink or blue.

Thanksgiving lunch at my sister-in-law's house. This Thanksgiving will feel odd, at best. Patrick and Zach have to stay in Charlottesville. The soccer team is not allowed home even for the day. Uncle Mac won't come from Michigan as he has every year I can remember since as far back as my husband's 21st birthday. He came for the funeral. He'll come for the burial at Arlington National Cemetary. A third trip this fall isn't really possible. And, of course, Granddad won't be there. The empty places at the table loom large.

Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's house. I'm grateful to my sister, who seems to know whenever I have dissolved into tears lately. She has a sixth sense about that, probably cultivated long ago in the dark of night when she was supposed to be asleep in her own room, but crawled into my bed instead. She's planning a lovely evening, complete with birthday cake for Mike, whose birthday falls on Thanksgiving Day this year. 

It will be different. It will be good. 

And then there will be soccer this weekend in Charlottesville...

 

Gathering My Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

I think I need another thick layer of topsoil on the front bed. When the girls planted tulips, I'm not sure they dug deep enoough and now I'm worried they'll freeze.

::listening to 

The hum of the dryer.

::clothing myself in 

Black. Again. When my aunt died in September, my sister urged me to buy a new black dress. By the fourth death this fall, I did. Funeral again today. That makes six dear souls for whom we are praying especially this November.

::talking with my children about these books

We're all listening to The Mysterious Benedict Society together. I can't recommend it enough!

::thinking and thinking

 

 

::pondering 

I'm pondering the Eastern tradition of St. Philip's fast and the wisdom there. Saint Francis De Sales counseled even lay people to fast beyond the minimum; "If you are able to fast, you will do well to observe some days beyond what are ordered by the Church".) Furthermore, Pope Paul VI raised the norm even higher in regions “where economic well-being is greater”, stating that in such areas, “so much more will the witness of asceticism have to be given in order that the sons of the Church may not be involved in the spirit of the world.” 

As grocery stores explodes with the abundance of Christmas, I'm doubling down on our efforts to look at the season through a different lens. The only catalog we've kept for list making purposes is the Food for the Poor gift catalog, where each of my kids is deciding what to give. They are debating the merits of soccer balls over chickens...

::carefully cultivating rhythm

I'm grateful to have thought through a November rhythm. I expected that it would be more at-home and more peaceful. But life--and death--happen. I'm still grateful to have had the plan.




::creating by hand

I have my list of gifts to make and I really thought I'd be merrily crafting them by now. Maybe I'll get to it by Friday. It's a pretty fun list and I am excited. But first, a pause to catch the last few rays of November light.

 

::learning lessons in

grief. We all experience it so differently. Grieving with someone and walking someone through her own grief--all very tricky. 

::encouraging learning 

Stephen is still faithfully writing for National Novel Writing Month. November seems like a great month for national initiatives. Stephen's writing a novel. Patrick's trying to grow a beard-- or something. I like Stephen's chances;-). Fortunately, Patrick is very secure in his manhood, with or without facial hair. He's looking rather like Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

::begging prayers

For my friend Megan and her family and for the repose of the soul of her beautiful mother, Cynthia McMullen.

For our dear friend Shawn Kuykendall, who is suffering terribly, and for his family and friends.

For Elizabeth DeHority, who faces a new round of very difficult chemotherapy today.

::keeping house

The basement is clean. Really clean. And the kids are so much enjoying the space downstairs that I think they'll help me keep it so. I am definitely an autumn deep cleaner. I still have a few more things I want to get to before Advent begins. My favorite Advent hymn is "People Loook East." Honestly, I love the phrase, "Make your house fair as you are able. Trim the hearth and set the table." It's been humming in my head all month. I do this when I am expecting a baby, too. The first couple weeks, after the positive test and before I start throwing up, I put meals in the freezer and try to get everything as clean and organized as possible to withstand the storm that is the first 16 weeks. Then, after the hyperemeis subsides, I seize the second trimester (what's left of it) and I clean and organize like crazy. I know that a newborn brings its own sweet chaos, so I do things that make that postpartum period easier. But I also want to have everything "just so" for the baby. The baby, of course, never notices. Still, I persist in this theory of getting my house ready for a noble guest every single time. The third trimester, I focus on baby "decorating" and readying baby clothing and supplies. I've recognized that I nest during Advent, too--and even before. November is all about that deep cleaning. I don't like to bring the trimmings out into a mess. Advent is readying for the baby.This year, as we grieve, we've thrown ourselves into the pre-Advent purging with considerable enthusiasm.

::crafting in the kitchen 

We've been making meals to take to friends. We brought dinner and basket of goodies to Megan last week. Tomorrow, we'll bring breakfast. And on Thursday, we're bringing dinner to Ginny, to celebrate new life. I figure dinner there is my ticket for unlimited baby holding. Looking very forward to inhaling that sweet boy. I'm looking for ideas. What are your favorite meals to bring or to receive? How do you make bringing meals something special?

::loving the moments

Patrick and the rest of the UVa soccer team defeated Notre Dame on Friday night to make it to the ACC finals. They lost to Maryland in a heartbreaking finish in the finals. I have lots of pictures to share, but time's really short right now, so I'll have to put them up here tomorrow. There were lots of very cool moments. The game was fairly local for us, at a park where my youth soccer players play all the time. So, it was like coming home for Paddy. My favorite moment was sweeping the stands with my camera and seeing so very many people there for him. At the first game, our friend from high school, MaryKay and her young family came to cheer. The second game we packed the stands. There were the regulars--my dad and his wife; all our kids (except the Sugar Plum Fairy); Stephen's godfather, Bill, and Beverly; Christian's godfather Jim and his daughter Rachel; and then there were old friends: families from Stephen's and Nick's former teams; the manager's family and the photographer from Paddy's youth team;  even a dad from Michael's youth team days. Several people came from Mike's office.  My friend Lisa (who started as an online friend and is now a flesh-and-blood friend) and her husband and son were there. Usually, Lisa and I live soccer games together via text. It was such a gift to have her right there! And, Mike's sister came and brought his mom. She rarely leaves the house and, though this game felt local to us, it was wandering far afield for her. It was good to gather together.


::giving thanks 

the comfort of the liturgy--from the Liturgy of the Hours, to the liturgy of the Mass, to the liturgical year--there is comfort in knowing that some things are never changing.

living the liturgy

I'm having to reconcile myself to the fact that though we say we live the liturgical year, some of the things that "we always do" because they are part of our liturgical celebration, aren't really necessary to celebrate liturgy with the Church. I've worked super hard to establish traditions around the liturgical year. In those baby years, when everyone was little and Mike was traveling all the time, it was really hard to make sure that we did certain things on certain days. But we did it. I wanted my kids to go out into the world when they were big and know wherever they were that certain days are set aside to fast or feast and always, always to pray. I wanted the liturgical year in the domestic church to be an anchoring peg. I wanted traditions to be for them what they are for me--reliable, predictable, purposeful places of the heart when the world is turned upside down. And I was kind of passionate about it.

St. Nicholas day has always been really huge. I told you about my stocking meltdown last year. You offered great ideas in the combox. I had hoped we'd  press on better than ever. The reality is that we won't do stockings on St. Nicholas day this year, for some of the reasons I outlined last year. And for resons that never occurred to me. And we have a new reason it will be different that day. For 23 years, it's been stocking day. For 13 years, it's been Nick's Name Day. But for 90 years, it's been Granddad's birthday. It still is. But this year, our real life jolly old man won't be with us to celebrate. 

Michael and Kristin are making their own traditions. Patrick and Christian will be deep into exams. St. Nicholas day is in need of something new. Something enduring?

I've often considered the habits of celebrating the liturgical year to be the tracks upon which our family prayer life are laid.

We live an advent that is intentional and filled with meangingful activity and pockets of quiet peace. And even when they're grown and gone, I'll still live those days much the same way.

 I thought my children would travel through life, navigating twists and turns and always have the signposts of the liturgical year to keep them rooted in the faith of the Univeral Church. The reality is that academic calendars and NCAA tournament schedules don't consider the liturgical year. The reality is that they are going to choose to make new traditions in their own homes. 

So, while I don't regret a single early December scramble to ready myself for St. Nicholas day and I will always sing the candle songs for each day of Advent and I'm not one bit sorry for thorns on salt dough crosses during Lent, and by golly, someone will have to read me all the books when I'm too old to see, I urge young moms not to be so wrapped up in those traditions it rocks your world when they die or are abandoned. And please, please, don't let it all be about the cupcakes; you'd be amazed how quickly they are too old for cupcakes. Think hard about investing in traditions that at least have the potential to be adopted in the new homes of grown children. And when they don't adopt them, it's probably best to just look back fondly at the memories you created and not be terribly sad they're over, but be wonderfully glad they happened.

Really and truly, the liturgical year is much more enduring than cinnamon rolls on the Feast of St. Lucy. Those things bring great joy. They have great meaning and I still believe that they make for a childhood that is rich with wonder and reverence and joy. They are not the source and summit of handing on the faith.

::planning for the week ahead

Some visiting to do. More soccer. More Nutcracker. More later;-)..

 

Gathering my Thoughts

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

The Bradford Pear tree in my front yard is always late to the autumn color show. I’m so glad. All the other trees are faded and nearly bare. This big beauty still has most of her leaves and they are turning from green to a glorious red. Lovely, lovely, lovely.

We planted 90 bulbs last week--one for every year that Granddad lived. In the springtime they will radiate all kinds of glorious color. At least I hope they will.

::listening to 

soccer practice. It’s the Monday routine, no? It’s quite chilly. Regular season games have ended. And still, Stephen has four practices this week and a couple weekend scrimmages in the works. There is no off-season, friends.

::clothing myself in 

Yoga pants, sweatshirt, and hand knit cashmere socks sent to me by Elizabeth DeHority. I spent the day cleaning the basement. I did shower and change but when I did, I just got dressed in another variation of the same. I’m going to sit in the car and write for an hour and a half and then go home, put small people to bed, sleep, and repeat the entire process. Mike’s out of town until Tuesday late. Not a much here that calls for earrings or proper clothing.

::talking with my children about these books

Jan Brett’s new book Cinders arrived a few days ago. Love, love, love that our fairytale explorations can take on a new volume.

::thinking and thinking

About all the things I thought I was going to do this year, mostly writing projects and speaking opportunities and all the things I did instead, mostly mothering. Thinking what a grace it is to be at peace with that equation.

::pondering prayerfully

“Our condemnation is often the veil for our own weakness: we cover up our own nakedness with the mantle of criticism; we see the mote in our brother’s eye, but never the beam in our own.” ~Venerable Fulton Sheen

::carefully cultivating rhythm

We are intentionally living each November day according to the healing plan. So far, so good.

::creating by hand

Surprises to send across the country.

::learning lessons in

Grief and gratitude. One is more bearable if every time it invades my brain space I chase it with the other.

::encouraging learning 

Had a discussion of “logistics” with one of my children today. Said child asked, “What, exactly, are the logistics that get a baby into a mom?” Um. Not the UPS man, my dear.

::begging prayers

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

::keeping house

I am on a serious deep cleaning mission. Everywhere. Absolutely everywhere. It’s purge and vacuum in every corner of my house. Amen.

And today is that glorious day every fall when all the laundry gets caught up.

::crafting in the kitchen 

I deep cleaned the pantry yesterday. I took everything out, wiped it all down, and put back only healthy things. For me, this appears to be a first step every time I successfully get back on the grain-free/dairy free wagon. I desperately need to get back on that wagon.

There are a few baking mixes on the top shelf, reserved in case we are required to bake on a moment’s notice (yes, that does happen). Other than that, there is nothing but whole food in my kitchen. By the way, somehow I have come to possess six pounds of red lentils and four pounds of green lentils. Feel free to share your favorite lentil recipes. I’d be most appreciative.

::loving the moments

when I know I just invested a whole day in the hearts of my children.


::giving thanks 

for a home my children truly love.

living the liturgy

I’ve moved my morning Liturgy of the Hours time yet again. Sarah Annie loves to cuddle first thing when she wakes up. She wants me to sit and be still and just hold her. Turns out she loves Morning Prayer, too. I’ve promised her that time every day and she holds me to it. We do Night Prayer together, too. In her bed. She’s yet to remain awake until the end. Truly beautiful way to close out the day.

Liturgy is a gift. For me, in times when I’ve doubted or struggled with the community of the Church, it is liturgy that has sustained me. Scripture and prayer and wisdom of the saints of old. A lovely, sustainable rhythm for any day in any season. And if you drift away, it will be right there, unchanged, awaiting your return.

::planning for the week ahead

*More deep cleaning.

*Hopefully, a visit to hold a newborn baby

*Hopefully, a trip to Germantown to the Soccerplex for the ACC semifinals on Friday and finals on Sunday. Hopfully.

*More Nutcracker rehearsals.

*Another soccer tournament for Nick.

 

Gathering My Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

There are two new trees on my front porch, awaiting some nice big holes. Mike’s studio sent us a crape myrtle and a dogwood to be planted. I’ve always wanted those two trees! I’m looking forward to getting them in the ground.

::listening to 

soccer sounds. I’m at the fields again while Nick plays. Familiar sounds of happy boys. Music, really.

::clothing myself in 

For the funeral, my boys all wore their wedding suits. A couple of them had to be let out several inches each. There was something incredibly powerful about looking down the pew at five boys dressed alike, five profiles so very much the same. Like arrows in a quiver…

 

::talking with my children about these books

The Mysterious Benedict Society! Oh my gracious, what a great book! Nick, Stephen, and I listened to it all the way to New Jersey and all the way back last week. Highly, highly recommended.

::thinking and thinking

About death and grief and legacy and blessing. I will never look at grief and mourning the same way again. I will never assume that my presence at a wake or a funeral is insignificant. I noticed every single person who came to grieve with us and I sincerely appreciated each one. This came as a surprise to me, no big lover of crowds. With each person, we were given a little piece of memory and not one was insignificant. I cannot overstate how much their presence meant to me. From a young age, Catholics are taught that burying the dead is a corporal work of mercy. Now, I fully understand why.

::pondering prayerfully

I’d love to tell you that it’s Scripture that has run through my head this week, but it’s not. At least not consistently. Instead, it’s Bette Midler.

Did you ever know that you’re my hero,

And everything I would like to be?

I can fly higher than eagle,

For you are the wind beneath my wings.

 

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,

But I’ve got it all here in my heart.

I want you to know the truth, of course I know it.

I would be nothing without you.

Thank you, thank you

Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings.

 

Everything I would like to be. Amen.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

We’ve certainly lost our rhythm. Even the very basic stuff of life like sleep. Until last night, every night was interrupted by a child calling out in the night. Some of them were not so very small. If we can just restore sleep, I’m hopeful that the rest of rhythm will find us, too.

::creating by hand

I had a long talk with Ginny this morning about a Honey Cowl. Yarn is ordered. I still have sleeves to knit on my baby sweater and a sleeve for Karoline’s Tiny Tea Leaves, but that cowl will happen sooner than later, mark my words. Besides, sleeves scare me.

::learning lessons in

What’s really important. Careful readers will recognize that I was struggling a bit before my father-in-law died, just trying to resolve some things that have long troubled me. The loss of someone very close, together with a studied reflection of his life—very well lived—have made some of those puzzles of last month seem easy to solve. These days have been wracked with grief, but I sense certain peace in our not-too-distant future.

::encouraging learning 

Math. In an effort to regain our routine, I have insisted on math. Today, we will pull the books for “E” Week, though I don’t think we finished D. I just can’t go back that way. Better to move forward.

::begging prayers

for the repose of the soul of Eldo Merlin Foss, beloved husband, father, and grandfather.

::keeping house

My sweet sister is sending a cleaning lady at the end of the week. Incredibly thoughtful gift.

::crafting in the kitchen 

Hilary brought us lasagna on Monday. My sister sent an abundance of Chinese food on Tuesday. Kristin brought a million bagels the morning of the funeral. My mom sent sushi the night of the funeral. That’s all we ate all week. Everyone survived.

For Monday Night Football this week, Nick made Manhattan-style clam chowder. Back in the saddle. We’re getting there.

::loving the moments

when I catch his eye and know he’s remembering the same thing I am.


::giving thanks 

for friends:

::the one who received my urgent text on Sunday and prayed me home from the tournament. Neither of us knew what I was driving into and neither of us knew what Mike was already facing, but God did and His grace was sufficient.

::the one who prayed while I wrote

::the one who is too pregnant to move, but willingly sits and listens to me ramble on and on, while I try to make sense of the jumble in my brain.

::the old friends who picked up right where we left off and came to be with my family, to remember, and to comfort us with their presence.

::far-flung friends who have prayed for us and sent words of solace.

::my sister-in-law’s friends, who provided food for strangers and loved our tribe well.

::Mary Beth’s friend Molly, who sat with me for hours and sifted through years of photo memories. Sometimes friends are more than friends and when they are, they are Molly.

::Patrick’s friend, Zach, who was there with Granddad the last time my children saw him, was there on Sunday afternoon when Mike shared the news that he was gone, drove Patrick back to school, and then came home with Patrick for the funeral. Together with my boys, Zach carried my father-in-law on Saturday. We are grateful for Zach’s strength.

::my sister, the oldest friend I have. She has an uncanny knack for knowing when I’m at my absolute lowest and calling just then. Her support this past week has meant the world to me.

::living the liturgy

There is a beauty to living liturgy, a beauty that reveals itself in moments of sorrow. Planning the funeral Mass was a source of great comfort. Celebrating that Mass in community with people dear to us is a gift that defies words. God is very good.

::planning for the week ahead

We are going to put one foot in front of the other this week, trying to restore rhythm, stopping to soothe sad hearts, tending to the business at hand.

Tomorrow is Mary Beth’s 17^th birthday.

On Saturday, Stephen will play in the State Cup Final Four in Richmond. Mary Beth will go to a homecoming dance.

Life will go on.

Gathering My Thoughts

.

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Nick and I were later than we’d hoped to be to goalkeeper training Monday night. We made a decision to pull over and capture the sunset. He’s been so desperately wanting to do this that I took iPhone pics and put the big camera around his neck. We’re both very pleased.

I’ve been consciously focusing on home these days, trying to hear God’s call here and to appreciate the beauty in both this time and this place. All the pictures this week were taken at places very much a part of my daily round

::listening to 

ringing in my head. Mike and I went to our high school reunion Saturday night. We got back to the hotel around 1:00. When I found myself shivering and nauseous around 2:00, I thought maybe that’s what happens when I go over my one-glass-of-wine limit (I had two glasses in the space of seven hours, but you never know). I don’t know why I didn’t remember at the time that my girls have recently had what Karoline called “the dizzy fever.” Dizzy fever indeed. Thanks for sharing with Mama. I’m still shivering and sweating and my head’s ringing.

::clothing myself in 

Yoga pants, sweatshirt, and hand knit cashmere socks sent to me by Elizabeth DeHority. The rain and the wind brought cooler temperatures to the evening. Nothing like welcoming autumn weather with a touch of cashmere.

 

::thinking and thinking

About this:

Unfortunately, experiences of moral failure, group meltdowns, personal pettiness, and partison harshness in congregations and ommunities make us wonder if our efforts in building community are worth the trouble. We often invest great hope in our Christian communities, and when there are serious ruptures, it feels as if part of the kingdom has been trampled. How is it that people who want closer relationships and deeper experiences of shared life sometimes find themselves in terribly difficult situations--sorting out betrayals, broken commitments, and creeping cynicism?

Growing into the likeness of Christ and into the church as it's supposed to be cannot be separated from the messiness and disappointments that are part of human relationships. We can protect ourselves from such difficulties only by cutting ourselves off from our relationships, and that is rarely a satisfactory option. Nevertheless, we can build and maintain congregations--just like we do with marriages, families, monastic communities, and businesses--in better or worse ways. Good communities and lifegiving congregations emerge at the intersection of divine grace and steady human effort.

~from Living into Community.

I have a lot of regrets about community in the last decade. Most about an online community where I invested far too much time and assumed far too much about friendship. Sadly, there has been a fair share of trial and scandal in our local church community, too. In both cases, the scars, particularly where some of my kids are concerned are deep and still painful to the touch. And yet. And yet, try as I might to deny it, I know He created us for community.

Just where? And how?

::pondering prayerfully

“How is it God, that you have given me this hectic busy life when I have so little time to enjoy your presence? Throughout the day, people are waiting to speak with me, and even at meals, I have to continue talking to people about their needs and problems. During sleep itself I am still thinking and dreaming about the multitude of concerns that surround me. I do all this not for my own sake, but for yours. I only hope that for you it is truly a sacrifice of love. I know that you are constantly beside me, yet I am usually so  busy that I ignore you. If you want me to remain so busy, please force me to think about and love you even in the midst of such hectic activity. If you do not want me so busy, please release me from it, showing other how they can take over my responsibilities.” St. Teresa of Avila

::carefully cultivating rhythm

At the beginning of a season, rhythm takes careful thought and quite a bit of discipline. Then, it sort of dissolves into a natural, easy flow. We have finally reached the flowing stage. Alleluia! Amen.

::creating by hand

I bound off on the body of a baby sweater last night. On to the sleeves! And I cut a top for Sarah today. I hope to feel well enough tomorrow to sew early in the morning.

 

::learning lessons in

Food again. I slacked off on the “no gluten-no dairy-no sugar” resolve. It’s always really hard during birthday week. I’m seven pounds heavier and my joints are stiff and painful. So, if I needed to learn whether food makes a difference, I just did.

::encouraging learning 

in geography. My four-year-old can look at the shape of a state and the outline of the country (with no states outlined) and put her finger on the spot where that state belongs. She can do it for all 50 states consecutively without missing one. I did nothing. Stack the States app is all kinds of amazing.

::begging prayers

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

::keeping house

I think dipping leaves in beeswax and bringing autumn to the mantel are in order this week.

::crafting in the kitchen 

Is anybody else putting pumpkin in everything? I can’t seem to help myself...

.

.

.

::loving the moments

when we gather with friends and family on the sidelines of a soccer match. On Friday night, we had dinner with my father and stepmother. We went to watch Patrick play. There, we met my friend Sharon and her husband. Sharon went to high school with us and she was a dear friend in my early mothering days. Sitting next to her, sharing mom hearts, it was just like old times. Even better.


::giving thanks 

for our high school reunion, old friends, and warm conversations.

living the liturgy

I’ve moved my morning Liturgy of the Hours time from the closet with my bike to the sewing room. I know I do this at the risk of not being able to squeeze the exercise in at midday, where I now have it penciled. But right now, I need to make a commitment to sewing time and sewing has naturally become a kind of prayer. So let’s see how it works there.

::planning for the week ahead

Colleen arrives tomorrow. After a whirlwind trip all over the country meeting interesting and influential people, she’s going to spend a few days resting and recovering here. I have no one influential lined up for her and nothing especially interesting. Our days will be filled with autumn walks, homemade soup, crusty bread, and the Jane Austen movie marathon Karoline has planned.

The weekend will take the boys and me to Princeton, NJ for a soccer tournament.

 

.

.

.

.

Gathering My Thoughts

'

.

.

.

.

.

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

I love the way the sun sets at the soccer field. It’s happening earlier and earlier each evening. Next week, we might miss it altogether. I am determined to bring my camera tomorrow in order to attempt to capture it. The iPhone just isn’t cutting it.

::listening to 

soccer practice.

::clothing myself in 

Denim shorts and an orange shirt, neither of which I owned last spring. When we first saw possibilities for the cover of Small Steps, I didn’t much prefer the one that was chosen. It’s been a few babies since I’ve felt comfortable in shorts and orange isn’t really my color;-). When I received word that the “shorts cover” was indeed the cover chosen, I went shopping. I try really, really, super hard to be wholly authentic. If my book had a picture of a lady in shorts with an orange shirt and her feet up drinking coffee, by golly, I was going to make every effort to try that whole scene at least once. So, I did.

I still rarely put my feet up. I don’t drink coffee regularly. My couch does not match my orange shirt. And the orange shirt still isn’t really my color. But the denim shorts?

I kind of love them.

 

::talking with my children about these books

we spent a lot of time talking about 9/11 books last week. The kids seemed to keep revisiting them, much more so than in years past. We haven’t yet talked about the recent D.C. shooting. I put a ban on all television where they might be exposed. I spent a fair amount of time making telephone calls in my car so that I was safely out of earshot. I need to figure out how to approach this one. This time, it’s going to take me a few days to find words.

::thinking and thinking

About God’s unique call. I wonder sometimes at the damage done by a women’s movement that fought so hard and so long to persuade the culture that women can do it all—be wives, mothers, employees, employers, artisans, crafters of the ideal life. No ceiling, no boundaries, no limitations. But there are, aren’t there? Natural law makes it so. There are only so many hours, so much energy. We can’t do it all and we likely will burn ourselves out trying. The culture tells us we can. God doesn’t. God calls us uniquely to live as He created us and He grants us abundant grace to do it. He didn’t create us for burnout. That feeling of being stretched too thin, doing everything halfheartedly and nothing well? That’s not of God.

::pondering prayerfully

Let yourself be seen by all as you really are. Just as we are in the sight of God, so let us be in the sight of all.

~ St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross

::carefully cultivating rhythm

We are in the second full week of the total schedule. I’m finding my writing pockets. Those are like little nuggets of gold. Writing does for me what knitting does—it calms me; it organizes my thoughts; it leaves me feeling full. I get a little stressed out when I’m not sure how I’ll fit it in. It relaxes me to see those golden nuggets of time reveal themselves.

::creating by hand

I did the things Monday that keep me from sewing. I prewashed a whole bunch of yardage. And I traced. I ordered some patterns (that I thought I’d already ordered but apparently in my sleepless stupor last week I never sealed the deal). I’m planning some shirts and dresses for my girls and a little love bundle for the mail. Now, I might actually get to sew!

::learning lessons in

appliance maintenance. Just in case there is someone else out there who doesn’t know: Take the cover off your dryer every month. Vacuum out the inside. I’m not talking about the lint screen. You have to clean that every time you switch loads. I’m talking about the innards, where the heating element warms the drum. Lint gets in there. And it can catch fire. When it does, it causes the thermostat to overheat, igniting the safety valve which shuts the whole thing down. That’s the best case scenario: you get a load full of dried clothes that smell like you had a wild time in a smoky bar and you have to replace the thermostat.

The worst case scenario is the stuff of nightmares.

Really, go vacuum out the inside of your dryer.

::encouraging learning 

We’re hitting that sweet spot between planned lessons and following rabbit trails. I’m not an unschooler; been there, done that, paid a huge price. I have a plan and I have some non-negotiable essentials. But I do love a good jaunt in  an area of interest that reinforces the whole notion that learning is fun and has purpose.

::begging prayers

for the victims of the tragedy in Washington, D.C., both those who lost their lives and those who lived through the horror. My stepbrother works in Building 197. He saw unspeakable things.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

And yes, for that intention I was keeping quiet; it’s still very close to my heartJ  

::keeping house

I am nearly caught up after being without a dryer for 9 days. Go me.

::crafting in the kitchen 

This morning I made a quick decision to return to Monday Night Football Geography. With that decision, I committed to cooking on Monday nights according to the cities that are playing. Tonight’s dinner was super fun.

::loving the moments

It’s been a rough couple of days. I caught some sort of virus late last week and it has hung on. That, coupled with a lack of sleep, a mountain of laundry, some great ideas that I don’t have time to get into print, an unintentional oil spill and cleanup to rival BP in my driveway, sewing projects that are not yet begun awaiting the magic moment, and the very tragic news of Monday morning had all combined to bring me way, way down. I sent a friend a quick note around midday Monday and she stopped and spent an hour just talking and sharing and understanding. I love the moments when I feel understood. We really need to do that for one another, don’t we? We need to understand.


::giving thanks 

for the safety of the people I love tonight. Really, it’s not to be taken for granted.

living the liturgy

We are approaching my favorite stretch of liturgical feasts. I’m so grateful for the way that the liturgy aligns with birthdays in my life. Five years ago, we began the novena for St. Therese on the September 23, the feast of Padre Pio. I began to bleed that night and the doctor in the NICU told me that birth was imminent. My baby was 28+ weeks in utero. I didn’t deliver. Instead, I spent several days in the hospital and then I returned home where I was forbidden to get out of bed. I surrounded myself with the saints. I’m going to tell you more about that tomorrow. Just know that those saints kept me safe in their prayers. My daughter was born –early, but healthy—on the vigil of All Saints. So very appropriate. And, not long after, when my world crashed and rocked and I began to question the Church because of the people in the Church, I could not walk away. Because I could not leave the communion of saints, I could not leave the Divine Office, and I could not live authentically without living the liturgy.

::planning for the week ahead

I return to the eye doctor Tuesday at noon. I would dearly love for her to tell me that we’ve made progress on this whole warped eyeball thing. I only have one ear. My eyes are working at about 50%. Just know this: I have an incredible sense of smell. So there’s that.

Mike is taking a bunch of boys to watch Paddy play Tuesday night. It’s absolutely beautiful soccer weather. That’s a good thing because we’ll return to Charlottesville Friday and then we’ll begin State Cup for Stephen back here on Saturday and there is a match for both Stephen and Nick on Sunday.

I do love to watch them play.

 

 

Gathering my Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Karoline made an amazing daytime discovery last week. While she was playing with her treehouse-dollhouse in front of the sunroom windows, she looked out onto the vegetable garden and discovered a rather fat groundhog munching away on the okra. Mystery solved. Now what to do about him?

::listening to 

Goalkeeper training. One hour every Monday night. Just long enough to put a post together while I sit in the parking lot, I think..

::clothing myself in 

Running shoes, capris, t-shirt. I really planned start Couch to 5K tonight. Then I got here and decided to blog instead.

::talking with my children about these books

The Chronicles of Narnia and in which order to read them.

And I've pulled out our 9/11 books.

::thinking and thinking

About Syria and the complexities of this world. Heck, the complexities of my nieghborhood, where Martin Luther King would cringe to discover that all that the children played together in our big backyard until the day of the epic argument when one of them said there was one God and another countered that there were really 7 and then someone chimed in that Mohammed was better than Jesus and then... none of them came back. True story.

::pondering 

Our work for peace must begin within the private world of each one of us. To build for man a world without fear, we must be without fear. To build a world of justice, we must be just. And how can we fight for liberty if we are not free in our own minds? How can we ask others to sacrifice if we are not ready to do so?... Only in true surrender to the interest of all can we reach that strength and independence, that unity of purpose, that equity of judgment which are necessary if we are to measure up to our duty to the future, as men of a generation to whom the chance was given to build in time a world of peace. ~Dag Hammarskjold

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Wellll… Last week was a mixed bag. I really don’t know how well my intended rhythm will work, yet. We had a death in the family on Sunday and so, an unexpected trip to New York at the end of the week. I left Mary Beth in charge at home. She kept them all alive and well, but my rhythm? Not so much.

I've also come to recognize that my gym routine from last winter isn't going to work this fall. So, it's back to the exercise bike in my closet for me. I could still hit the gym in the early morning if I wanted to but I don't really see the point of driving there for cardio. It's the classes I really love and those don't fit into our school days since they've eliminated some early times. So, for this season, it's the close bike thing and "mat classes" online at home with my girls. And maybe even Couch to 5K around soccer fields.

::creating by hand

I hung the draperies for the dance studio today. I’d like to do some fall shirts for the girls this week. I saw new Oliver + S patterns and I’m very, very tempted.

On the trip to New York, I knit some love into a sweet little cardigan. Very sweet. Very little.

::learning lessons in

flexibility. I work really hard before a new term to think through every possible detail. I make lesson plans, driving plans, meal plans. Then, I go after those lists with all kinds of diligence to try to make them come to life in a composed, orderly fashion. Then life happens. The first week of school found me asking near strangers to take my children to soccer, packing a suitcase, and leaving Mary Beth in charge as Mike and I left the state. Mary Beth promised to try to stick to the plan and make it all remain calma nd orderly and predictable. She explained to her boss, our state delegate, that she would not be in to work.

He called anyway. He explained that there were some letters he needed her help writing. Then, there were about 4,000 other letters that need to find their way into envelopes. So, she called an audible and "Shakespeare Friday" became this:

::encouraging learning 

This week is for tweaking the longterm plan. I’ve definitely planned too much for some of my children and not enough for at least one of them. Tweaking is a good thing, I know, even if right now it feels like a nuisance.

 

::begging prayers

for the lonely and depressed.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

And yes, for that intention I was keeping quiet; it’s still very close to my heart.

::keeping house

Let’s see. I left town for a couple of days, oh and the dryer is broken. So, yeah, this afternoon was all about a major cleaning blitz. The dryer thing should be solved by Wednesday. If it’s not, there will be a mandatory laundromat trip on Thursday.

::crafting in the kitchen 

The cooler weather has inspired a craving for Pasta Fagiole or Minestrone or Mulligatawny Stew. Or all three.

::loving the moments

when my extended family is gathered. Even though the occasion was sad, it was happy. My great aunt lived to be 96. She had a way of making sure that everyone thought he or she was the favorite. She lived life full-on and she loved the same way. It was really a blessing to celebrate a life so well lived.

 


::giving thanks 

for life and breath and hope.

living the liturgy

Making plans to celebrate all those favorite feasts of fall (lots of links there).

 

::planning for the week ahead

This is our first full week of homeschooling, full soccer schedule, and full dance schedule. It’s also the week of our 26^th wedding anniversary.

 

Gathering My Thoughts

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

Something rather large had its way with my garden a couple days ago. From the trampling and the tracks and the height of the leaves that are gone, I suspect a deer. If you could see where I live, you’d know why this hard to wrap my brain around. It’s just not that rural at all. That was one very audacious (or lost) deer.

::listening to 

the ceiling fan. I’m in Charlottesville this morning, enjoying quiet in the morning before a really busy day.

::clothing myself in 

Today, I’ll wear a white eyelet shirt and a khaki colored skirt. I’ve packed a gauzy scarf that sort of ties it all together, but it’s going to be ninety degrees and humid. So, we’ll see about that scarf.

 

::talking with my children about these books

Let the book discussions begin in abundance. Tomorrow is our first official day of the term and it’s going to be a Storybook Year.

::thinking and thinking

About transitions.

 

::pondering 

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles." ~Audrey Hepburn

::carefully cultivating rhythm

I’ve worked really hard to plan for this school year. An actual schedule, subject-by-subject? That’s going to have to grow organically. I sense there will be undue demand on the two laptops we have and on the new iPad. Several of our planned subjects are computer-dependent. And there will be some demand on Mom, too. So, we’re just going to have to see how it all sifts out. The first day is always tricky.

::creating by hand

We did some back-to-school sewing—a couple of pretty notebooks covers and I finally got around to helping Kari finish a pillowcase she started long ago. I still need to make headbands for Karoline’s dance company before dance begins next week. And then there are draperies for the dance studio.

 

::learning lessons in

a new season of life.

::encouraging learning 

I have everything all keyed in Homeschool Helper. We'll see how it goes.

::begging prayers

for the repose of the soul of my beloved Aunt Ida, who died yesterday.

for all the intentions of our prayer community.

And yes, for that intention I was keeping quiet; it’s still very close to my heart.

::keeping house

I had hoped to have the basement perfectly clean by the time school started. It’s not. Christian’s room is perfect and the bathroom is very clean (and in need of a contractor), but the rest is still happening slowly. My new goal is to have it clean by the time Colleen visits early next month.

::crafting in the kitchen 

My freezer is nearly stocked. This “stocked” status is actually far fewer meals than when the same freezer was stocked previously. I’ve been freezing in glass jars because I’m trying not to use plastic. Zipper freezer bags laid flat are far, far more space saving. It’s a conundrum because this glass thing isn’t terribly efficient.

::loving the moments

when, after three and half hours wait time at DMV, Mary Beth got her driver’s license. Oh, happy day! She promptly scrubbed the spare car clean of all big brother evidence and volunteered to go to the grocery store and the dry cleaner and the hardware store and the ...


::giving thanks 

for a healthy heartbeat!

living the liturgy

Making plans to celebrate all those favorite feasts of fall (lots of links there).

::planning for the week ahead

I am in Charlottesville this morning, headed to Harrisonburg at noon, then back to Charlottesville for soccer tonight. Tomorrow, we begin our new term. There will be a visit to National Zoo. And then, there's soccer in Fredericksburg and Richmond at the end of the week. If nothing else, these litttle girls are truly getting to know Virginia.

 

Gathering my Thoughts

::noticing God's glory: 

The tips of the leaves are already changing color. This is early for Virginia. I read yesterday that The Farmer's Almanac is predicting an exceptionally cold winter. I believe it. I'm taking inventory of boots, coats, and gloves and stocking now. The child whom we call "Super," who happened to be born just after his father touched down upon return from a Super Bowl production turns 15 the day of the Super Bowl this year. He's already planning a party. There's a mighty storm predicted.

::listening to 

Sleepover girls eating French toast and making plans for the day. Last sleepover of the summer... 

::clothing myself in 

Fleece. It's chilly this morning but I know I'll shed layers as I go.

::talking with my children about these books

The other day, I saw the reading list for a high school. There were eight books across the curriculum, outside of textbooks. That's eight books for four years! So we've been talking about "don't miss" high school books. What are your suggestions?

::thinking and thinking

About how to explain the Middle East to kids. And how my father really did try to explain it to me. It's inexplicable really. Pray.

::pondering prayerfully

Romans 15:13

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Sigh. We made some major decisions, left two beloved teams with longtime, very close friends, and made our radius much, much smaller. 

I've reconstructed the master calendar for the next term. It's busy, but it's definitely do-able. I'm taking this week to think through every detail of rhythm and make sure that it's all intentional.

::creating by hand

I've pushed aside the "for me" blouse for the time being. Instead, I have a little birthday sewing to do for a friend of ours and I have some delicious fabric on its way for some very fun gift sewing that has spent too long in my brain. And there's a length of fabric stretched across my dining room table that is destined to be curtains for the dance studio. And then, there are fourteen more headbands that still need to happen...

::learning lessons in

finding my way around the county. I've done so much driving in other towns that I really don't know my way around my own backyard. At least I didn't until last week. After a very poor beginning in which I made my husband lost and late for work, I spent the rest of the week acquainting myself with all the (beautiful) fields all over Loudoun County as Nick and stephen had practice every day, sometimes twice a day. It was busy, but it was good, and now I have my grocery shopping, errand running mapped out for when the regular school year rhythm begins.

::encouraging learning 

You asked about this screen shot:

It's the Homeschool Helper app for iPad. Aimee uses it and I admit that this app was what pushed me to acquire an iPad. So far, I've really loved it. I'm nearly finished planning. The caveat, of course, is that I haven't actually used it yet day-to-day.

Speaking of the iPad, stay tuned for a guest post full of educational apps. Very soon!

::begging prayers

There's this private {all good} intention close to my heart. Could you send a prayer up for this intention? One day, I'll tell you all about it.

::living the liturgy

Today is the Feast of St. Monica. She's pretty special. Beautiful prayer and icon here.

::keeping house

We're making slow progress in the basement. Christian's room and bathroom have been thoroughly cleaned and sanitized. I think the kids see the potential now. Hopefully, they will be more active participants in working the rest of it. This week, I'm all about getting the house really well kept so that we begin the school year from a place of peace.

::crafting in the kitchen 

I've been stocking the freezer with the bounty of the Farmer's Market.

::loving the moments

when tough decisions are affirmed. Nick's new team played his old team in a tournament last weekend. It was good to see old friends and we all felt very loved. The new team beat the old team in the semi-finals. One dear family stuck around to watch the finals with us. It's a gesture I will long treasure. When you've spent all weekend at the Soccerplex with two different kids playing and they're both finished and you really can go home and have half a Sunday, it's a big deal to stay and watch one more game. Turns out this game went to overtime and then penalty kicks. Nick was in goal for the PKs, made some great saves, and won the championship. It was a very sweet moment. Throughout the course of the day, the dear friend who made it all work for me last year, told me all about her decision to send her kids to school. It's the right decision for their family. Just as an aside, that decision would have mean that our plan would have come crumbling down had we not moved the boys closer. All good.


::giving thanks 

for peace as the new term approaches.

For some special people who sent Christian off with more love than I could have imagined. They chose the verse for Christian, but I've been carrying it around and considering it in my own heart a great deal since that night. 

::planning for the week ahead

I need to take Mary Beth to get her driver's license. Feel free to pray for that.

The rest of the week is all about preparing for the school year.

We have a great deal of activity coming our way this weekend. Nick has a tournament in Maryland. Patrick plays Friday night and Monday in Charlottesville. Tuesday is our "official" first day of school. I think I see apple picking on the agenda that day.

Notes to Self

::noticing God's glory: 

My tomatoes are doing good things! We won't have enough to can or anything, but we at least have enough to feed the whole family at once. And okra! Yippee. Look for an okra and tomato polenta recipe on Friday.

::listening to 

Dance studio chatter. 

::clothing myself in 

Yoga pants, t-shirt, lightweight sweatjacket. It's chilly. Really.

::talking with my children about these books

Well, not books, but stories. I love to listen to books/podcasts while I work around the house and I'm trying to share the value of that with my kids. We've recently discovered Sparkle Stories. Love:-).

::thinking and thinking

about the role I want the Internet to play in my life. Food for thought:

What it Looks Like to Have a Cyber Sabbath

Switch off the Static and Turn on Your Mind

and I'm eagerly reading an advance copy of Hands Free Mama's new book. 

::pondering prayerfully

"No book is really worth reading at the age of ten which is not actually worth reading at the age of fifty." C. S. Lewis

This is my guiding principle for the school year.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Sigh. We made some major decisions, left two beloved teams with longtime, very close friends, and made our radius much, much smaller. I'm thinking about a post about why we did what we did for as long as we did and why we made a change. But then I think no one would ever do what we did and my experience probably has nothing to offer anyone else. 

::creating by hand

I really want to sew something other than headbands...

::learning lessons in

asking Jesus all day long.

::encouraging learning 

A number of people have asked about math curriculum. I hesitate to offer anything in that regard. Really, I've yet to find the magic math curriculum. But I do love Dreambox. 

I'm super excited about plans this year, which is a lovely surprise. For the younger three, it's going to be a Storybook Year, heavily dependent on these lists (browse the lefthand column--there aren't enough days in a childhood for the treasures here). For the older three (and the younger, too, actually), lots of fresh inspiration from these thoughts:

Nature Deficit Disorder

Teaching Boys & Other Children Who Would Rather Make Forts All Day

The Four Language Arts

Nurturing Competent Communicators

Fairytales and the Moral Imagination

 

::begging prayers

Please continue to pray for Shawn, for Elizabeth DeHority, for my friend Carmen, and for my mother-in-law, who soon begins radiation treaments.

And for a private {all good} intention close to my heart.

::living the liturgy

It's nearly time for the St. Monica novena. What a perfect novena at a time when two of my boys embark on a new college semester. Novena begins on August 18th. Join me?

::keeping house

I frequently refer to the wreck that is the basement. Last week, I posted some pictures of said wreck on Instagram. I think I surprised some people. It really is a wreck. I'm overwhelmed by the wreck. But we're making slow progress. Some big items are leaving permanently, off with Christian and his friends. If I'm honest, I think I'm working up my anger over the wreck so that I won't be leveled by the sadness that will be inevitable when he and his basement band are no longer making gigantic messes down there. What ever it takes...

::crafting in the kitchen 

I ate Domino's gluten-free pizza the other day. It was delicious. It's NOT gluten-free. 'Nuff said. 

::loving the moments

when I'm snuggling her to sleep and her hair just smells so good and life is peaceful. And light. And lovely. 


::giving thanks 

for special prayers at dinnertime.

::planning for the week ahead

The coaches Christian has teamed up with for the last several years have planned a going-away party for him on Friday. And then, he goes on Monday. I sort of have tunnel vision.

 

 .

.

.

.

.

 

iPhone pics, all mine. That one of Mike making wildflower bouquets just about does me in. 

Have a beautiful week, friends!